And then there is my son.....

Have you ever had one of those days when you wake up and nothing seems to be working like it should? One of those days where you just know you're going to be in a bad mood all day long? My day started out like that, black cloud and all.

And then there is my son........

I have just spent the last hour watching my son amuse himself with a few plastic dishes a dish cloth and a sink half full of soapy water. Suddenly, my day is a lot better. He splashed water everywhere, the whole kitchen is soaked, I may even have to rewash a few of the clean dishes. And you know what? I could care less. I smiled and I laughed with my son and watched him be amazed at the things he can do with a simple sink of water and some bubbles. It was, by far, the best part of my day!

Black cloud? What black cloud? All I can see now is my sons smiling face. It's a good thing.

Signature Fragrance

Apparently, as a woman, I'm supposed to have a "signature fragrance". Why? I mean who decides these things? Is there a group of men and women just sitting in some little room right now, thinking about all the things we are "supposed" to do in order to be complete, fulfilled human beings? How does my having a "signature fragrance" make me a better person? How does it improve the state of humanity? When I die, is it what I smelled like that I'm supposed to want people to remember?

I've made a list of the things, that according to magazines, television and radio, we are supposed to do in order to be the best human being we can be:

(1) Drink Milk, apparently, it does a body good. If you drink enough of it you will eventually look like Venus Williams, or if you're unlucky, Kermit the Frog. I didn't even know frogs liked milk.

(2) Drive a REALLY big vehicle. Something that you used to have a special license to drive. Am I the only one that thinks it's absurd to see women that can't even see over the steering wheel driving vehicles capable of climbing mountains? Scary.

(3) Wear clothing that looks like it was made for Barbie Dolls. Who ARE these women? I went into a store professing to sell clothing for the "plus size woman" I happen to be a plus size woman and I can tell you , these clothes were not designed with me in mind. It looked more like they took teeny, tiny t-shirt and stretched it out, like we used to get yelled at for doing when we were kids.

(4) Donate to all the "popular causes". From what I can tell, right now it's heart disease, cancer and disaster relief. Why do we need celebrities to tell us that these things need attention? And why is it only the causes that find celebrity support that get attention? Come on people, if it's serious, then take it seriously. If you can help, do it! Don't wait for someone to tell you it's chic to do it.

(5) Read whatever Oprah says we should. Now, while I think it's good that people are reading more, I find it sad that the multitudes of these people will only read it if Oprah says they should. We all see how THAT one turned out, don't we? ( And for the record, I didn't read " A Million Little Pieces " . I saw it in a store before the glowing Oprah review and thought it didn't sound very good.)

(6) Have things list "signature colors" and "signature fragrances". Apparently we are supposed to believe that by doing what everyone else is doing, we will somehow be unique. Okaaaayyy.....and the flaw in that logic is where? Anyone see it? Good, moving on.

(7) Strive to be so thin we can't stand up on our own. This should be accomplished by eating only protein, no wait, eating only carbs, no wait, avoiding carbs, no wait, drinking all your meals, no wait, surgery....no wait. Good grief, how about eating well, exercising a little and not throwing on the fast food feed bag? Anyone remember going outside to play as a child? how about we teach our children the same thing. Fresh air is GOOD for you!!! If you aren't a size one, who CARES???

(8) Use cosmetics that are not tested on animals. This is a good thing, but what they don't tell you is that for the statement on the back of the package to be true, only the FINAL PRODUCT need not be animal tested. It does NOT mean that the chemical compunds, and individual ingrediants weren't tested on animals. If you're serious about this one, do some checking....all you have to do is call the 1-800 number on the back of the package. If you ask, they have to tell you.

I'm sure that there are more that I have neglected, if you can think of any, please let me know.


I'm not as young as I think I am

Stephanie and I decided to go out again on Friday. This time we actually made a plan, and get this, for the most part, we stuck to it. Chalk one up for us!

Steph came out and picked me up around four on Friday and we stopped at Subway on the way back to Salt Lake and had a bit of dinner. Nothing exciting, but good conversation. When we got to Salt Lake, we went and did a little shopping then stopped at the dollar theater and bought tickets for two movies.....a 9:30 show and a Midnight show. Then we did a little more shopping.

While at the mall, we managed to give two teenage girls something to tell their friends about on school on Monday...." There were these two weird women in the bathroom at the mall...." Not that we were doing anything weird, but through the eyes of a teenager, two grown women laughing out loud and behaving like we don't KNOW we're two grown women....yeah, put that in the "stange" category.

We went and saw "The Ice harvest" starring John Cusack ( Can you say YUMMY?) and Billy Bob Thorton. It was a really good movie, a little slow in spots, but good all the same. I would have to say, that despite the fact I think John Cusack is a great actor, the best part of the movie was the character played by Oliver Platt. I recommend this movie, you should check it out.

After "The Ice Harvest", we went to see "Zathura". It's based on the book by Chris Van Allsburg. We were surprised by how good it was. Both Stephanie and I thought we would like it, a little, but we laughed most of the way through. Again, I think this is a good flick to see, even if you don't have children.

By the time "Zathura" was over it was two in the morning. We headed back to Tooele.....oh did I mention that when we got to Tooele, instead of going right home we stopped at Wal-Mart first? Yeah, Wal-Mart at three in the morning. You see, Stephanie had been bribed earlier in the evening to take me to South Towne mall so that I could get a couple of Mrs. Fields stuffed cookies.....YUM!!! ( cravings, you know I love them) So we stopped at Wal-Mart to fulfill the bribe..........New Movies!!! Stephanie is almost more of a movie junkie than I am, imagine that!

I finally got home around four thirty in the morning. I was just getting ready to go to bed when my son woke up, so mommy didn't actually get to sleep until shortly before seven on Saturday morning. This is where I discovered I am no longer as young as I think I am. I woke up later feeling like I had been on an all night drinking binge. Apparently when you are 35, pregnant and raising a toddler, staying out all night is not such a bright idea, who knew?

I'm afraid to say, that even with this knowledge Stepanie and I are likely to repeat this behavior, it seems to be in our nature.....ahh well, at least I'll be smiling with the bags under my eyes!!!

Later folks, I'm off to watch Bugs Bunny with my son!


The DUI Hotline??? No, seriously...

I went out tonight with Stephanie (more on that later) and we were out driving around, killing time between movies. We were grooving to some great tunes on the radio when all of a sudden a commercial comes on. Now I generally ignore commercials, they tend to be stupid and not worth the effort required to listen to them, but this commercial caught my attention.

"Did you know that in the State of Utah......" Blah, Blah, Blah...this guy is spouting facts about Utah DUI laws, then he starts in on how this law firm will help you beat a DUI charge. It was hideous! I was in shock. I mean come ON!!!!

DUI is one of the only crimes I can think of which is TOTALLY preventable. If you pick up an alcoholic beverage.....DON"T DRIVE!!!!! How hard is this concept for people to grasp. And I don't even want to hear the, " There was no other way to get home!" argument. When you go out, and you know you're going to be drinking, you make a plan.....to take a cab, to have a DD, to call a friend....something, but you DO NOT drink and drive.

As far as I'm concerned the only question the judge should ask is, "Did you know it was illegal to drink and drive?" And then the person should get sentenced. People say that one drink shouldn't be considered drinking and driving, but then where do you draw the line? Three drinks? Five drinks? People die needlesly every year because people who drink are to stupid, to stubborn or to proud to find another way home.

Adequate defense? Yes, I think people are always entitled to it. Getting people off for doing something they should have to take responsibility for? Inexcusable. It saddens me to think that this is where our society is standing. Do we really want to allow people to get off because they weren't "that drunk"? It makes me sick just thinking of the possibilities.

I dropped this law firm a message tonight, letting them know that I think their ad is tasteless. I would hope that anyone else who lives in the Salt Lake Valley area and hear's the ad will do the same.

All right, I'm done ranting now........


I Fart In Your General Direction......

As I was speaking with Judy this morning, she mentioned reading a review of Spamalot. This made me think of Monty Python and the Quest for the Holy Grail, and then I decided I had to look up the home page for Spamalot.

They have Killer Rabbit Slippers!!! I need a pair of killer rabbit slippers, I mean who doesn't! And I am sooooo ordering that pin! I suggest you all check out the site, shop a liitle! And for God's sake, if you have the ability to get tickets to see the show, run out and DO IT! Then email me and tell me all about it!

That's all for now, I'll be back tonight with tidbits and info on the night out with Steph!


Ahhh.....the day to day of living, don't we love it?

Well my dear readers, life strikes again. I got up this morning, intending to run to the bank and cash my paycheck, only to discover that I couldn't find it. You heard me, it has disappeared. My current thinking is that my son somehow got ahold of it and threw it away without us noticing.

Okay, I can get through that......I called and asked them to cancel said check and reissue me a new one.

But wait......

As I was walking down my hallway I noticed the smell of gas. Now, I didn't panic, mostly because I'm pregnant and have a SENSITIVE nose, but when Russ said he could smell it too? Well that's when I called Questar. They sent a very nice technician to my house and low and behold, my heater had not one, but three leaks......so he red tagged it, I now have no heat.

Then he goes outside and discovers that our water heater isn't rated for installation in trailer homes, so he red tags THAT!!!

Let's recap the day so far:

(1) lost paycheck
(2) no heater
(3) no water heater

My day just gets better and better, doesn't it. Ahh, but wait, there's more!!

Russ goes to get the mail and what should he find? A letter from the state of Utah. Seems his ex-wife has filed a complaint, she doesn't feel she's getting what she deserves. So now we have to get an attorney, go to court and defend ourselves against her wild accusations. Somedays I really dislike that woman.

You think that's it? Oh no dear readers, the day from hell is far from over. Not only do we have to deal with Russell's ex, we also have to deal with mine. Seems he thinks he can play fast and loose with custody and is setting up yet another attempt to take my daugher from me. Why? I have no idea.

*smiling* See, now I feel all better! It's so good to know I can talk to you!

On the brightside of life:

James and Judy will be here in ten days, and in twelve we get to take them to a doctor's appointment with us to see and hear the baby!!! This excites me and fills me with hope that not everyday is a bad one!!!

That and Stephanie and I have started working on a book for submission.......

So you see dear readers, not all is lost!!!

I'll keep you posted!


Things I Want To Do Before I Die

Note: This list is not in any particualr order, just how they popped into my deranged little mind! It started when I was 15.....and just didn't stop.

(1) Go-Go Dance, boots and all
(2) Learn to ballroom dance
(3) Visit China
(4) Go Sky Diving
(5) Meet Duran Duran ( okay, even at 35, this one still ranks right up there)
(6) See a Broadway Play, on Broadway!
(7) Publish at least one novel
(8) Visit Stonehenge
(9) Drive across the US with a video camera and visit all the tiny, out of the way places no one remembers.
(10) Have a waterfall in the living room ( Okay, don't even say it, it's my list)
(11) Finish my degree and get a job as a University teacher, tweed skirt and all (All Right, maybe not tweed, but you get the idea)
(12) Learn to tell people what I think of them, when I'm thinking it ( I've learned to do this, now I'm learning when I really should do it.....very tough)
(13) Learn to laugh out loud when I feel like it ( Another one I've since figured out how to do
(14) Wear a size 10 again ( I'm STILL working on this one, I have my doubts)
(15) Go to an expensive restaurant, order the cheapest thing on the menu and share it with a friend for hours, just because. Stay until they throw us out. ( I have to admit that I think this one would still be a hoot, an I bet I could get Stephanie to do it with me.)
(16) Get a job as a commentator with a televison station, just so I could stand on the red carpet and say what we're all thinking, " Who dresses you? And do you NOT own a mirror?"
(17) Speak in front of Congress just to tell them what I really think of the lot of them. ( I admit, this one is NEVER going to happen, but a girl can dream)
(18) Take my daughter to Europe when she graduates high school

I'll stop there, the list goes on for awhile, maybe I'll put some more of them up later.
Feel free to put some of the things you want to do before you die in the comments, it will be interesting to see.


The Long and the Short of It

My grandmother used to say that all the time. "Here's the long and the short of it." When I was a girl I never really understood what it meant, now I think it means," Here's the quick and ugly version."

Money has been tight for the last several months so as a family we decided that things like cable television and the internet were not actually necessary to our daily survival. Turns out we were right.

In August we found out that God does have a sense of humor after all. I started feeling sick all the time, so my first thought was, " Oh crap, I'm pregnant." Like a good little adult, I ran out to my local Wal-Mart, bought a pregnancy test and went home immediatly to pee on the oh so convienent stick. The test came back negative.

Breathing a sigh of relief I decide I have a stomach bug and decide to wait it out. Almost a month later I was still not feeling any better and I decide that I am dying of some horrid disease. So, once again playing the responsible adult, I make an appointment with my doctor. The draw blood, they have me pee in the cup.....and then *insert dramatic drum roll here* my doctor tells me I'm PREGNANT!!!!!!

My first response? " No, I'm not, I can't be." Anyway.....I'm pregnant, and fat and not happy about it....the fat part anyway.

We decided, again as a family, that we could not afford to have another child at this time, so we began looking into adoption. We found a wonderful couple in New York that will be adopting the baby. James and Judy. They are coming out here to Utah to meet us in February and will be back for the birth.

Other than that not much has been going on.....well except for my daughter living with her father and the whole red-neck cops moment that happened a couple of months ago on my front porch, but I'll save that for later.....

I don't want to overwhelm anyone.

A Funny thing happened on the way to my job interview....

So I'm sitting in the lobby of Teleperformance this morning waiting for my job interview to begin and I'm talking and laughing with Stephanie when who should come prancing through the door?? OH MY, it's Tasha!!! She had her chin stuck so high in the air that it was a wonder she coudl still breath. I had the hardest time not jumping up and shouting, " HEY TASHA!!!" Instead I sat and tried not to choke on my laughter as she so obviously ignored me and Stephanie on her way through the lobby.

It was a sight to behold, and it sure as hell made my day a little brighter. Nothing like having the ability to piss people off without even moving, huh????


A clean house is a happy house

My house smelled awful today, and the sad thing is I was the only one who seemed to notice. Something about my nose being hyper sensitive during pregnancy. Well that blows. So I went and bough trug cleaner and cleaned my carpets. And did the dishes. And made Russ help me clean the kitchen. And now things are all better. No more bad smell.

Yeah me!!! It's the little things in life that make me happy, you know?


Ahhh...the Internet, how I have missed it.

You know I never realized how often I was online until I no longer had internet access. I've missed being able to come in and post about the general bullshit that trips through my mind on a regular basis.

I have made a couple of changes to the blog because it seems that some people are IDIOTS and can't keep themselves from posting SPAM in the comments section. So to all my friends I apologize, your comments will no longer automatically appear, I will have to read them and then post them. I appreciate your patience.

I'll be posting a lot over the next week or so, trying to catch everyone up on what's been going on in my world.

See you soon!!!!