Is it just me?

I sat down intending to write a post about something that's been bugging the crap out of me. As I wrote it I was reading it and I sounded like a petulant, selfish child. I hate petulant, selfish me. I much prefer well grounded and understanding me. I'm not sure where she is at the moment, but I think if I look hard enough I can find her. For the time being though, I'm going to indulge the five year old child that still lurks in my brain....you've been warned.

Know what I hate? I hate when people whine and whine and whine about how hard their lives are when most of the shit they have to put up with is of their own making. You know the type, the ones with no kids and expensive taste that bitch about how they never have money in the bank? The ones that go out to really expensive restaurants and have the latest "new thing" and want you to feel sorry for them because they had to pay so much for the privelge? I hate that.

Know what I hate? I hate people who talk down to me because I don't have what they think of as a "real" job. I do freelance work from home, I'm a full time student AND I'm the mother of a four year old child..who has a learning disability. Oh, and did I mention we have no medical insurance, are not on any kind of state assistance and we pay for not one, but two major medical needs each month...OUT OF POCKET??? Yeah, so shut up! I do more in one day at my "non" job than you do in your eight hour "real" job. Fuck off!

Know what I hate? I hate people who bitch about how picked on or tired or lonely or blah blah blah.....but never do a damn thing to change their own lives. I hate professional victims. I hate the constant crisis mongers. I'm sure everyone knows at least one person who doesn't seem happy unless they're moaning about how unfair at least one thing in their life is, or was, or will be. As Christopher Titus said, "Get off the cross, use the wood to build a bridge and GET OVER IT!"

Know what I hate? I hate people that tell you they've "done all their going to do" for you. What the hell does that mean anyway? That ranks right up there with "it's all in your head" and "just work through it". Of course, these very same people will never attend the educational classes you ask them to go to, or come to any of the one on one sessions you've invited them to so that they can understand what might be going on inside your life or how important the recovery process is...noooooo.......maybe we should adopt this attitude for all illnesses, how about it?

*huge sigh of relief* Okay, I think I found grown-up me. Yup, there she is. The five year old still has other things she'd like to say, but grown-up me is asserting the right to self censor before we get ourself into trouble. But hey, if your inner five year old feels like letting loose, give it a go!

Iron and Wine

A boy with a coin he found in the weeds
With bullets and pages of trade magazines
Close to a car that flipped on the turn
When God left the ground to circle the world

A girl with a bird she found in the snow
Then flew up her gown and that’s how she knows
If God made her eyes for crying at birth
Then left the ground to circle the earth

A boy with a coin he crammed in his jeans
Then making a wish he tossed in the sea
Walked to a town that all of us burn
When God left the ground to circle the world

A friend of mine recommended this guys music and this was the first song I downloaded, just by chance. It's almost haunting.