"Blogging For Choice"

I have done the unforgivable. I expressed an opinion that upset feminists and called into question the issue of personal responsibility. How dare I? What was the hot button issue? Abortion. I am now being called ridiculous and reminded that no woman should be forced to raise a child. My feelings on this subject are not religiously based. I have had three unplanned pregnancies in my lifetime. None were convienent. None were well timed. I have made the choice to have the children and place them for adoption.

Let's look at a couple of things here, shall we?

Look, I'm just going to say it, I believe that abortion as a means of birth control is wrong. Anyone wishing to lambast me will please read the sentence again and notice I did not say we should all rush right out and make abortion illegal and strip women of the right thereby plunging us directly back into the dark ages (because we all know that limiting abortion would lead to women being stripped of the vote, the right to work and possibly even the right to wear pants in public.) ....but using it as a method of birth control because being pregnant isn't "convienent" is wrong. Rape, incest, cases of physical danger to the mother or a second child (twin births)? Totally different story. For me it comes down to personal responsibility. Birth control is readily available, even to low income persons...state Medicade programs will pay for most birth control methods, up to and including surgical sterilization. The 72 hour pill is readily available through doctor's offices and Family Planning clinics.

Using the 72 hour pill, you are preventing a pregnancy from taking place. Going to a clinic and having a pregnancy terminated means you are choosing to end another human life. Attach all the emotion you want to that statement, but the medical and scientific facts are that at two to three months the fetus is breathing, has fingers and toes forming, is moving and has started developing major organ systems. That's not just one or two cells, that's a person taking shape. Arguing that "a baby isn't really a baby during the first trimester" makes my stomach lurch. Within the first three months that little tiny being has started to develop organ systems and is moving. Again, this isn't based on anything other than hard science.

The argunment that, "It's my body and I should be able to do what I want with it" has never set well with me. If you don't want to get pregnant, don't have unprotected sex. And yes, it really is that simple.

I am astonished at how easily people are able to dismiss the fact that an abortion ends a human life and in place of that they have substituted concerns like weight gain and life-style change.

In my original comment about this issue, I simply asked the question, "When do we make people responsible for their choices?" I was told that choosing to have an abortion is being responsible. I disagree, choosing to have an abortion is simply the fastest method of dealing with an unwanted situation. Not only has the issue of ending a life been removed from the argument, but most people gloss over that fact that having an abortion has life-long psychological ramifications, just like adoption does. The difference? Women who have abortions tend not to seek professional counseling after having the procedure. They mostly seem to try and pretend they were never pregnant at all.

My feelings on this issue are definatly based on emotion. Having made the decision to carry children to term and place them for adoption has given me new perspective on it. Seeing the beauty that is a newborn child and seeing the equally beautiful look on the faces of a couple that thought they would never be able to experience the joy of being parents, I have a hard time understanding how anyone can remove the actual child in question from the decision. That makes me biased, I realize that. It's also the reason I don't attend Pro-Life rallies and scream for an end to abortion. Unlike the people who will attack me, I recognize that no matter what MY beliefs are, I don't have the right to force them on others.

I do, however, have the right to say them as loudly and as often as I want to.


knightjorge said...

How goes (or went) this lovely heated blog argument? You're still alive so I assume that they have decided against having you assassinated. Let that be a lesson to you; you're only allowed to have your own opinion around the open-minded if it agrees with theirs.

viciousrumours said...

Actually, shortly after I commented for the second time, someone else came in and commented and basically told people to got to F***ing hell. She was a woman that can't have children and is trying to adopt. She didn't pull punches, didn't try to be diplomatic....just said basically, "Don't sit and tell me how it's "Your Right" to kill a child I could love." So yeah, since then, surprisingly enough...no comments. Hmmmm.....

knightjorge said...

LOL That's fantastic! I love that they all cowered down and got quiet after someone told them where to go.

viciousrumours said...

Actually, I had thought it would have had the opposite effect. I thought for sure there would be a bunch of posts telling her where to get off...but they just sort of stopped.

I honestly don't think they were cowering down, I think maybe the people who post to that site had moved on to another topic by that time, but the timing was interesting. I'm sure someone will says something sooner or later.

SuperSnark said...

A lot late, but...

Even though I did a post for Blog for Choice from a position (and situation) quite different than yours, I just have to say that this was one of the most reasoned and rational posts opposite my own that I have come across. Generally the arguments come down to either "it's my body" or "you're a murderer". This one was neither.

Even though we're strangers and my opinion means less than zero, I just had to say that I respect and admire the choice(s) you made just by virtue of having read this. So thank you for taking the time to write it, obviously from the heart (and without anger, accusation, or finger-pointing, as many others did)...I gather from the earlier comments that you took some heat for it, which makes no sense whatsoever to me.

You finally "coming out" on Zero Boss was worth it so I could read this post. {smile}

viciousrumours said...

SS, thanks for stopping by and taking the time to comment.

I popped over to your blog and read your "Blogging For Choice" post. I left a comment.

Every situation is different, and I would classify the situation you found yourself in as one of "danger to the mother". Some may not see it that way, but I lived through the same kind of childhoos, so I know different!

Thanks again for your comment!

Suzanne said...

I agree with Snarky that I disagree with you, but I respect your stance. I am glad that you were able to make the decision that you did, although not all women are able to carry pregnancies to term without significant risk to their health (including mental) or damage to their existing families.

While I completely agree that abortion should not be used as birth control (and it rarely is), I'd also say that it is NOT as easy as you say for all people to get birth control pills. There is a scary number of pharmacies that refuse to carry or prescribe them, many insurance plans will not cover it, and pharmacists are refusing to dispense or stock the emergency pill. And there is a strong lunatic fringe movement out there working hard to make it even more difficult for women to use contraceptives or buy condoms.