Kids will be kids...If we let them.

I have been reading quite a few "parenting" blogs recently. You know, blogs written by parents that want to share what they feel are their unique insights or ideas, their thoughts, on this lovely adventure we call parenting.

Most of the time I find information, I find funny stories or I find things I can relate to. Sometimes, however, I find things that make me shake my head and snort in that unladylike fashion that my husband loves so much. One such post showed up today at Motherhood Uncensored. The author of this particular blog is funny and smart and I love to read her stuff, but this post points out, very eloquently, one of the things I think is wrong with parents today. They worry to much. About every little freaking thing.

I want all of you who are reading this to think back to when you were children. Are you there? Okay...now....who had parents that stuck you in every friggin activity you can imagine? Music lessons? Scouting? Dance? Sports? And how many of you secretly yearned to be at home, hanging out with your friends, doing nothing much at all? Again, show of hands, how many of you, as adults tend to be perfectionists or overacheivers? Uh-huh.....okay then...moving on.

My mother ( and I think we all know how I feel about her) never stuck me in a bunch of activities. Oh, that's not to say she didn't try. There was the failed attempt at Bluebirds and the Misery of Girl Scouts. Oh, and let's not forget The Horror of Religious Summer Camp 1982. Ah...and last, but certainly not least, my favorite, Torture by Volleyball. That was the last one. After that she figured out that she was wasting money, I wasn't going to actually participate and she wasn't getting refunds...the insanity stopped, thank god.

Here's my point folks. I was much happier when The Mother just let me run out the front door and spend my days happily roaming the neighborhood with my friends. I wanted to be out in the fresh air, in the sunshine. I wanted to stick my hands in the dirt and see what was there. I wanted to climb trees and hide and ride my bike until my legs hurt. I hated the "joiner" activites she wanted so badly to force me into.

Parents today seem to feel that if they don't sign their children up for every conceivable activity from birth that they are somehow neglecting them or harming them. They have classes for everything now...and starting at an age when the child really isn't getting anything out of it, but the parents feel better about themselves and whoever is putting on the class if making a ton of money off the guilt factor.

Children don't get to be children anymore. They don't even have Saturday morning cartoons anymore. That makes me sad. Everything has to be "educational" now. Why? Whatever happened to just letting kids be kids? Isn't there enough time to be a grown-up when you actually have to? Let your children just be children. Buy them some Playdough. Fingerpaint with them. Sing stupid songs at the top of your voices in the supermarket because it makes your child laugh. Watch dumbass cartoons and spin until your dizzy in the middle of the living room. Send your children out to play in the afternoon sun. Let them BE.

Is there a place for piano lessons and scouting? Sure...but quit obsessing about it. It should be something your child comes home from school and asks you to do, not something you tell them they have to do. My daughter takes art lessons...because she wants to. She doesn't take dance lessons, because she hated them...we tried it though.

Letting your children be children isn't going to land them on Dr. Phil when they're twenty telling the whole world that if you had only put them in voice lessons they would have gotten into Harvard and wouldn't be working at McDonald's now. Ease up. Let it go. You can not control everything, but you can make sure your children get to actually be children. Let them hang on to that joy for as long as they can, huh?

My three year old had Doritos, Hershey Kisses, Yoplait Yougurt, Orange Juice and two pancakes for breakfast this morning. In that order. Does that make me a bad parent?

And Baby make Three.....

As many of you may have noticed, I haven't been around for the past week. That's because on Tuesday, March 13th, 2007 I gave birth to a 7lb 3oz baby boy. We named him Galen Michael Sorensen. He was beautiful and perfect and two weeks early.

Just like his sister before him, we placed him for adoption...with the same family that adopted his sister. They named him Archibald James. He is still perfect and beautiful, but he is gone today. They got the official okay from the state of Utah to go home this morning and I'm feeling a little numb.

I know that it was the best decision for my son. I know that he will be loved and cherished. I know that I will see him and that he will know I made this decision out of love for him. But on the inside I ache a little. This is the third child I have had to say good-bye to in my life time and part of me wants to be selfish and ask why. Part of me wants to cry and scream and be angry.

And then there's the part of me that rejoices knowing that all three of those children are living the lives they were meant to live. All three of those precious gifts are being cherished and snuggled and loved. They will always have the warmth and safety of a family and they will always be part of something beautiful. People say they don't understand how I could give my children away. I don't look at it like that. I didn't give my children away. The adoption didn't make them any less my children, it just made them my children in a different way. I did the one thing I could for them as their mother, I made a good choice for them. Being a good parent isn't always about the easy choice.

To all my children: You mommy loves you.

And the survey says....

We have become a society of what I like to call "celebrity causes". Angelina Jolie is in Newsweek this week, talking about her "causes". International adoption, AIDS assitance in Africa, poverty in third world countries. All important and worthy causes and all causes that come and go from our sight line like the proverbial flash in the pan.

Anyone here remember the "One" campaign? When's the last time it got any media play? Anyone believe that poverty in third world countries just suddenly stopped being a problem? Nope? Me either.

The big one now is Bono and his Powe(red)campaign. It's everywhere. And in a month or two, the media will have moved on to the next trendy issue and no one will remember why it is they have four pairs of red sunglasses.

The thing that disturbs me the most about this trend is that none of it focuses on issues here at home. Poverty, hunger and humanitarian aid to war torn countries are all noble and valid things to get behind. The suffering outside of this country is as immense as you can imagine, sometimes to large a thing to fully grasp. It doesn't change the fact that we have children dying right here at home.

There was a story in the news last week about a twelve year old boy that died from a brain infection. He got the infection because he was denied dental treatment for a simple cavity, which turned into an abcess, which eventually spread to his brain. Why didn't he get treatment? His mother was to poor to afford medical insurance and because she was homeless, the state had "a hard time" getting her approved for Medicaid. So this little boy died.

I'm a frequent reader of a blog called C.U.S.S written by a very funny, very intelligent woman named Suzanne. Suzanne lives in New York and is a member of a group called the Haven Coalition. This is a group that ensures that young women who have made the legal choice to have an abortion have a safe and healthy place to stay after the procedure. Groups like this are necessary because while people are screaming and ranting on both sides of the fence, someone forgot that there are real people involved. Real people that are making life altering decisions and need the support of caring compassionate people, even in small ways.

There are children living in shelters all across this country because their parents can't afford the high cost of rent or can't find employment that will allow them to support their families. Sometimes, the only real meal these children get is the one they receive at school.

This is happening here. Right here. This is one of the wealthiest nations on the planet and we have children dying from a lack of decent health care and starving to death in rundown homes.

Each time you donate to the latest "celebrity cause" remember that there are a lot of things that need tending here in our own backyard. Don't forget the people around the world that need our care and compassion, but don't sweep the suffering of our own under the rug.

Get involved. Write a letter. Commit a post on your blog to bringing attention to issues like these. Make a noise.

You Say It's Your Birthday......

My son turned three yesterday. When he got up in the morning, the first thing his father and I did was start singing to him. He got this very serious look on his face, crossed his arms over his chest, shook his head and said, "No, no birthday." This cracked me up.

Later we gave him his presents and he stood on the kitchen chair while we tried to sing to him again. Apparently the addition of gifts made my singing acceptable because this time he danced a little dance and nodded his head along with us. The PlayDough was a big hit. Shortly after we finished playing with the new PlayDough there was a knock at our door. It was the FedEx guy. (I love my Fedex guy, he is always bringing me cool things.) He had a package for my son. Our friends James and Judy sent him this AWESOME set of magnatized balls and tubes that you build stuff from. He hasn't quit playing with them since we opened it. He slept with them last night. It is officially his favorite thing. I have to admit, they're damn cool blocks.

After dinner it was time for cake. My son stood at the kitchen table and looked at his birthday cake as if he had never seen anything so beautiful in his life. He smiled, he clapped and then he stuck his fingers in the frosting.

Even though his birthday is now officially passed for the year, all day long he has been walking around saying "Happy Birthday" to everyone. I have a feeling that we will all be hearing "Happy Birthday" from him for about a week.

I love being a mom. My kids remind me that it's okay to sing even if you can't carry a tune, dance when you feel like it, sleep with your toys and just generally have a damn good time. Even if you don't have children, take that lesson to heart. Never forget that it's okay to live like you mean it. (I know most of you who read this already do!!!)

Have a good Sunday everyone!

What's on your reading list?

I read. Well, okay, I don't just read. I read A LOT. More than the average person I think.

Now I want to know what you've been reading. Recommend a book to me. Give me a new list to start on, something I've never picked up before.

I'll post about each of the books I read and give credit to the person that suggested it...cause this is my blog, and I can.

"Feminism" used to be a dirty word to me. I'm not a woman that believes that just because I have a uterus and boobs I should get special consideration for everything I do. I don't believe that dirty jokes told in the workplace are a form of sexual harrassment. I don't think that by putting men down we will ever accomplish anything.

Those were the things I associated with feminisim. In a short I believed that to be a "feminist" meant you were a man-hater of varying degrees. I had an instructor in college that would target the men in our Comp class for unfair critisism and would inflate her praise for the female members of our class. After a week of this, I dropped the class. When I went in to get the drop form signed she demanded to know why I was leaving the class. I tried to be polite, even tactful, which for me is unusual. She kept pushing. I finally said, "I just don't think you're a good teacher. You're probably a very nice person, but you allow your personal and political beliefs to cloud your ability to teach." She was irrate. She called me a traitor to my sex. I shrugged and said, "And that would be what I'm talking about."

Recently, I have started reading a number of blogs written by women who use the terms "feminist" and "feminism" a lot. When I first surfed into these blogs, I was hesitant. I mean what would I find of value at a blog written by someone with such a skewed sense of the world, right?

Imagine my surprise when I discovered that these were women much like myself. Articualte, well educated, witty and insightful. No man bashing, no calling for the burning of bras or societal castration of the male race. No once. No where. I was puzzled. Perplexed.

These women have views and ideas that I find myself nodding in agreement to. They often have differing political views that make me stop and think, help me reevaluate where I stand on a given issue. They are mothers, and wives and sisters and daughters. I was amazed.

"Feminism" used to be a dirty word to me. Something to be snorted at and used as a vulgar epithet. Now I'm beginning to see that being a "feminist" isn't really all that different from being a "humanist". Interacting with these women has helped erase some long held and preconceived notions I've been carrying around.

I just wanted to say thank you.

Equal and Fair....

Over the last two years, I have done a lot of research into the family court system and it's treatment of non-custodial parents. While there are women who are non-custodial parents, most of them remain men. When I began my research I had certain preconceived notions. As I continued to look at things, those notions were challenged.

Recently, the Utah State Legislature passed several laws regarding child support, non-custodial visitation and enforcement of child support and child custody guidelines. As of January 1, 2008 the State of Utah will be able to take up to 75% of a non-custodial parents income while providing no relief based on a second family. A weakly worded bill providing for "mediation" of custody issues was also passed. The "mediation" costs have to be paid by the non-custodial parent and have no legal enforcement...meaning that the police will not enforce a mediation agreement any more than they help enforce a custody agreement entered by a court.

There have been several stories in the news lately regarding family court judges forcing men to pay support for children that are not even biologically theirs and yet the only real media coverage continues to be stories of overworked, underemployed custodial moms who look sympathetic on the evening news. While there are cases of "dead-beats" who don't pay their fair share, it has been my recent experience that those cases are not as prevelant as we are being led to believe.

Many non-custodial parents are being forced into underemployment and poverty situations by a system unfairly biased in favor of the custodial parent. While the custodial parent is given representation by the state, the non-custodial parent is left to either go it alone, or find a way to pay huge retainers for private family law attorneys. They can be jailed for back support due, which is not legal for any other form of debt in this country. They can be arrested and charged with contempt of court, but are never given a trial by jury or access to an attorney .

In short, we provide more rights to convicted child molesters than we do to non-custodial parents. I'm left to wonder where the media outcry for this injustice is. Is it okay simply because we are comfortable assuming that these men (and a growing number of women) must have done something wrong?

Put yourselves in the place of some of these people. You wake up one morning and simply because you are divorced with children, you find that all of your basic civil rights have been stripped from you and there is nothing you can do to defend yourself from it. How would you react?

We hear talk about equal treatment under the law and fair assessment of support. Take a few minutes this week and look into the family court system and laws in your state. Do they seem equal or fair?

Because a Cheeseburger and Fries is what I think of when I hear this song....

Blister in The Sun


Is anyone else disturbed that this tune is now being used to hock cheeseburgers for Wendy's?

In which I wave to the world.....

I had vistiors from Dingley and Tally Ho, Australia today.

That's about the coolest damn thing that's happened all week. I love that those are real places.

Big wave to all my visitors from the far reaches of the globe! (And those more local as well.)

Last week I noticed several posts about the little boy in the UK who is over 200 lbs and his mother, who faced losing custody of him over the issue. My first thought on reading about the case was, "Well, she should have known better. She should have done something."

I refrained from commenting on the posts and gave the issue some thought. Along with the sentiment that this mother was being neglectful I saw several posts and resulting comments that echoed the same thought. People with weight problems lack self-control, are somehow less intelligent or simply don't care about themselves. Over and over I saw comments like, "Put the cheeseburger down and get some excersise." What I read began to trouble me.

As a woman who has struggled with weight issues most of her life for a variety of reasons I can tell you first hand how the comments of people who don't stuggle with weight can hurt. When you're overweight, it's all anyone sees. Take right now for instance. I'm pregnant, on restricted activity and adding to this, I tend to gain weight...a lot of weight...when I'm pregnant. People look at me and they don't see a college educated, intelligent woman. They see a fat woman. Their assessment of me ends there.

The next time you see someone that is overweight, stop and think a moment before you start damning them. You don't know that person, you don't know what led to thier weight gain or the inability to lose that weight. There are medications that cause severe weight gain. The people who take them face the choice of using a life saving medicine and being large or being sick and possibly dying. There are medical conditions, both mental and physical, that lead to weight gain. Bulimia and Anorexia are not the only eating disorders. Sever emotional or physical abuse can lead to the use of food as a substitute for emotion. Even income bracket and education level can contribute to these problems.

While it is easy to view someone with a morbid obesity problem as sloppy and stupid, it is usually far from the truth. The next time you find yourself tempted to make generalizations regarding someone based on their appearence, stop and remember this: You are only as good as your treatment of the people you encounter on a daily basis.

Get off your high horse and learn to value people for who they are. If you really want to make a difference and help stop the obesity problem in this country, volunteer for an educational program at the local health department. Volunteer to help with activities at the local community center or Boys and Girls Club. The people you ridicule are still people and don't deserve your scorn.

I thought I had something I wanted to say tonight. I was wrong. I have nothing of importance to add to the world this evening.

Instead, I've decided to say "hello" to all the people who have been popping by the site and thank them all for stopping by and reading whatever strange, ridiculous or, on the odd day, inspired thing I happen to write.

In the last several days I have had visitor's from all over the world. This makes me feel all kinds of warm and fuzzy. I like warm and fuzzy.

So there you have it. My post about nothing.

Good night!

Some much needed laughter.....

I was randomly reading through some of the blogs I visit when I got to Motherhood Uncensored and the top two posts made me laugh so hard I almost woke the family up...go check them out.

They both made me think about my children and similar situations.

One day, shortly after the birth of my last child, my two year old son came into the bathroom as I was cleaning myself up, changing the pad, you know...the fun part of having a baby. I shooed him out of the bathroom and didn't really think about it again. Until.....

A couple of days later I was sitting on the couch visiting with a friend when my son brought me a pad from the bathroom. I looked at it and then looked at him with a BIG smile on his face. He was so proud to have brought me something he was sure was important to me. I laughed. My friend laughed. I learned to hide the personal hygiene products.

Now his favorite thing to do is run through the house screaming, "I naked" after every bath. Dripping wet and laughing like a loon he will dodge me while climbing over the couch and trying to get his door closed before I can catch him. I laugh everytime he does it.

Meanwhile, my husband has lost the capacity for rational thought because he has realized that my daughter is getting armpit hair. His brain automatically filled in teh empty gaps and he realized that this means she is likely getting hair in other places as well. Couple this with her recent boob growth spurt and the number of teenage boys that now smile in appreciation as she walks past them, it's a wonder the man can still talk without drooling. I hate to think what will happen when the magical, mystical period fairy arrives at out doorstep.

Poor man.

My husband talks in his sleep. Nothing that makes any sense, but it can be entertaining. Take tonight for example. He's asleep, I'm typing. All of a sudden he sits up and starts pushing my pillows around the end of the bed.

Curious, I ask him what it is he thinks he's doing. Eyes half open he says, "I'm trying to move these pillows."

"To the end of the bed?" I ask

"Where else am I going to put them?" he replies

I'm laughing at this point.

"And your moving my pillows why?"

He begins to look confused, "Yours. What happened to the ones....well, that quest I was on I had too..." his voice fades out and he starts shoving at the pillows again.

"Russell, lay down, shut up and go back to sleep," I say.

He flips me the bird.

"You're in bed dumbass, not playing World of Warcraft. My pillows aren't going to get you any XP."

He flips me the bird again and lays down. With in seconds, he's snoring again.

In the morning, he will not even remember it happened. I still get to tease him about it though.

Yet another unpopular opinion....

Once again, I'm going to say something that will be unpopular with most of the people that read it:

No one alive today owes anyone else that is alive today an apology for slavery in Colonial America.


There, I said it. The recent actions of the Virginia State Legislature are ridiculous. Who exactly are they apologizing to? And what exactly are they apologizing for? Apologizing for slavery is like saying that they had some control over it, that those of us alive today bear some responsibility for the actions of people now long dead. Isn't that the whole "Sins of the Father" argument?

Slavery was an atrocity. It is unthinkable to me that one human being could so easily overlook the value of another in order to make money. Sadly, it still occurs in many parts of the world. Children are sold into slavery by their own families on a daily basis. Men and women are forced into slavery by people promising a better life. The people who work to make our clothing and other daily use items are often treated as little other than animals. Where are the heartfelt apologies for these people? Have you stopped buying items that are made by the hands of these people? When you put on a t-shirt, are you sure it wasn't sewn by a child who doesn't even get paid? When you eat an apple, are you sure the person who picked it was paid a fair wage, provided protection under the labor laws and not forced to work fifteen hour days? I'm betting not.

If there are apologies owed, it is to those people in this country and others that are forced to work in substandard conditions for miniscule or no pay so that those of us with money can have the little things in life. The apologies should be coming from the men and women in our government that know these things are happening and do nothing to punish the American companies that make a profit on the backs of the poor.

Before we start apologizing for the things we had no control over, how about fixing the things we can control?

Early this morning, when I couldn't sleep, I was sitting around feeling sorry for myself. Mulling over all the missed opportunities and the wasted time. Moping about the things I hadn't done with my life. I was doing a pretty good job of sitting on my couch throwing my own little pity party.

And then my son fussed in his sleep and called for me.

I walked into his room, my mind still turning over all the things I had to be sad and upset about and then I saw him. The moon was shining through his window and his little eyes were still closed. He rolled over and curled around his blanket and my mind stopped stewing about all the things I haven't done.

Pity party over.

Just because it's FREAKIN' COOL

I read Neil Gaiman's online journal everyday. He's one of my favorite authors and someone high on my "I really need to meet him before I die" list. (Yes, I actually have a list)

At random times, Neil will post something that's been sent to him or that he's discovered that just makes you have to stop and think.

Here is a link to one of those things:

NFCTD

If you can figure that one out, you're a step ahead of the class.

While it will come as no great surprise to anyone who reads this blog on a regular basis that I have issues with abortion, it might come as a surprise to hear that I am opposed to overturning Roe v. Wade.

Today, Presidential hopeful John McCaine said he favors overturning the 1973 ruling that made abortion a legal choice for women in this country. He also stated that he would want to appoint more justices that will “strictly interpret the Constitution of the United States and do not legislate from the bench.”

Okay, great. So we do away with the freedom of choice and we put a bunch of old, white men on the Supreme Court to make desicions about what's good for all of us. Then what? What does Senator McCaine think is going to happen if he just does away with abortion as a legal choice for women? Does he believe that somehow people are going to stop having sex? Because that worked before 1973, right?

One has to wonder if Senator McCaine has done his homework about the lack of education and resources faced by low income women. How about the statistics linking child abuse to the age and education level of a parent? Or the statistics showing that if a child is born to an unwed parent, they themselves are more likely to become unwed parents? Need more? How about the fact that once a family is on welfare the likelihood that they will get off is very low. In fact, single parent households on welfare tend to raise children who become single parent families on welfare. It's a vicious cycle.

I am an advocate of changing the social structure and the education system to enable women to make choices that will empower them, teach them sel-esteem and help them not be in a situation where making the choice to have an abortion is necessary. Improce the education our children get. Put more money into programs that will mentor and help young men and women feel positive about themselves and their futures. Provide resources that actually help a single mother or father get up and out of the poverty they are in.

If you take the choice away from the women that need it most, you don't solve the problem, you actually make it worse.

The second thing I have issues with is the "strict" interpretation of the Constitution. Okay so....what we're saying here is that nothing has changed in the world since 1776. What kind of idiot actually believes that the strict interpretation of a document written in the 18th century is a good idea? Let's not forget, these were men who owned SLAVES for cripes sake. Men that thought women were good for nothing more than teaching or making babies. Men who actually believed that you were better than someone else based on the family you were born into or the color of your skin. Society was vastly different....hell, the WORLD was vastly different.

The freedom of the press: Placed in because the King of England would not allow anything negative to be said and could have someone put to death as a traitor if they dared to do so. Today: Needs to be upheld, but with common sense. Should someone be able to write whatever they want, even if it means people are killed because of it? Journalistic responsibility needs to be enforced as much as the freedom that allows them to exisit.

The Right to Bear Arms: Placed in because the only men allowed to carry weapons at the time were British soldiers who could kill you for anything and blame it on you. Today: I really doubt Thomas Jefferson was talking about allowing anyone with enough money to walk around packing a fully automatic assault weapon. Say it with me: Common Sense.

I could go on...."strict" interpretation of something, anything can lead to more problems than solutions. All you have to do is look at the Fundamentalist Christian Looney Tunes to know the truth in that. The freedoms we have are a wonderous thing. They allow us to have a society like no other on earth, for all it's flaws and all it's good works. Like anything, that society is fluid, ever changing. Our judicial system has to have the ability to change with it. More importantly, our judiciary has to be able to fulfill it's place in the system of checks and balances.

You get a bunch of Conservatives in the Legislature, stick just one in the White House and then pump up the Supreme Court with more of them....all we're going to end up with is a nation run by Pat Robertson and his buddies over at the "Sunday Come to Jesus" lobby. It's a scary thought.

Weigh In

Okay dear readers, it's time for you to weigh in.

Today my husband and I got into a debate and now I want the opinions of the people that read here (all four and a half of you).

Here's the question:

Is using the argument, "You always have a choice." morally ambiguous?

The debate is over the "choice" in that statement. Is having to choose between something that has an effect on other people, in a negative, possibly harmful manner and doing something you would rather not do, the same as choosing to have chocolate or vanilla when you're having ice cream.

Basically, my husbands argument was that even if it isn't a good choice, it's still a choice. My argument was that when it comes to problems or situations that effect others in a life changing manner, it's really not a choice.

I'd like to see where other people land on this one.

What's your view?

Credit Checks. Not just for credit anymore.

There was an article up today about the growing trend of employers to check a potential employees credit history. It raised the question of race and any possible civil rights issues.

I have worked for three seperate companies that have asked for me to sign a document giving them blanket permission to check not only my criminal background, but my credit history as well. Each time I have gone directly to Human Resources and told them that I will indeed sign a form giving permission for a criminal history check, but that I will not give permission for a credit check. None of these jobs involved a company credit card or expense account. I have also crossed out sentences in these documents that gave permission for the company to speak with "anyone" from my past they deemed fit.

I'm 36, no one at a call center needs to talk to my high school gym teacher and this blanket form also gave permission for them to access medical records. Of all three companies employing these practices, only once was I told my job offer hinged on my signing the documents as they were. I refused the job.

Forms like these are an end run around our civil liberties. If there is a clear case for a through back-ground check, such as involvment with law enforcement, working closley with children or some other sensative situation, I can understand wanting the ablity to speak with anyone in the persons past. If the job has a high stress level or requires specific insurance that can only be obtained by the company after proving the employee has no long standing medical issues, I can understand requesting medical records. If the position requires issuing a company credit card, expense account or some other direct access to company funds, I can understand a credit check. What I do not understand is credit, medical history or overly background checks for positions in places like call centers.

As the article states, there is no information linking credit history with job performance. I believe this is a broader issue than the way ethnic groups may be affected. Any of us that have had to deal with unexpected bills and the reality of living pay check to pay check can attest to the fact that keeping your credit score up is a struggle. How will this practice affect those in our society who are trying to acheive a better life?

We promote a way of life that can only be acheived by living above your means and then punish people when they fall victim to that particular Catch 22.

I will continue to deny companies the right to check my credit history, personal background and medical history. I encourage others to question the practice as well. Require that the company making the request give you a valid reason for accessing that information. It's your personal data, don't be so quick to give it up.