Because I'm at work and I'm bored....That's why!

Your Personality Profile

You are dignified, spiritual, and wise. Always unsatisfied, you constantly try to better yourself. You are also a seeker of knowledge and often buried in books. You tend to be philosophical, looking for the big picture in life. You dream of inner peace for yourself, your friends, and the world. A good friend, you always give of yourself first.

The World's Shortest Personality Test

You Are: 60% Dog, 40% Cat

You are a nice blend of cat and dog. You're playful but not too needy. And you're friendly but careful. And while you have your moody moments, you're too happy to stay upset for long.

Are You More Cat or Dog?

Arty Kid

Whether you were a drama freak or an emo poet, you definitely were expressive and unique. You're probably a little less weird these days - but even more talented!

Who Were You In High School?

Tired of this yet??? Well I'm still bored....

Okay, this one my husband is going to get a kick out of...

Your Stripper Song Is

Master and Servant by Depeche Mode "There?s a new game We like to play you see A game with added reality You treat me like a dog Get me down on my knees" Yawn, dancing is so boring without a little spice.

What Song Should You Strip To?

You Are the Very Gay Bert and Ernie!

Two grown puppets living together, sleeping in the same room? They've even got coordinating striped shirts!

What Gay Childhood Icon Are You?

Okay, I'll be done now.

Is there anyone left on the planet with MANNERS?

I work in an industry that requires face to face interaction with customers on a daily basis. Most of the time people are in and out so quickly you don't really have to worry about things. Other times, like today for instance, you get stuck dealing with people that treat you like it's your job to smile and eat whatever shit they hand you. Is there anyone teaching their children manners anymore? Or are all children growing up with this sense of instant entitlement?

Today a young woman walked into the store. I smiled and greeted her, asked how we could help her. She said she wanted to get a phone activated. Okay...used phone activation, usually takes five to ten minutes all total. IF the phone is able to be activated. Hers wasn't. I polietly told her that the phone still had account activity attached to it and that customer service or one of the corporate stores would have to take care of that before we could do anything. She snarls back at me "I was PROMISED by the store in Salt Lake that you would do this for me." Again, I try to explain that under normal circumstances it takes less than ten minutes to do, but that because the phone is still active on another account, we are unable to proceed. She snarls at me again, "Then call someone and fix it." I try to explain that calling customer service will lead to them telling me the same thing I just told her, but I call anyway, I even verify that the number I'm scanning is the one showing on the account. I have them check notes to be sure that there was no error, I have them check to see if it's only a matter of waiting a little longer....nothing. The phone is still showing active and therefore...you guessed it...I can't do anything.

At this point Miss Huffy-Puffy says, "Fine, then let me use your phone to call my mother in Salt Lake." Now I let her use a BUSINESS phone to make a long distance call and she dials about six numbers before she reaches her mother. She tells her mother that I won't LET her activate the phone, so I correct her by saying, "It's not that I won't let you, it's that I am unable to." She huffs into the phone and I say, "If you'd like I can speak with your mother to explain what needs to be done so we can activate the phone for you." She turns around and snarls at me, "You don't have to be a bitch to me." I say, "I'm not." She snipes back, "Yes, actually you are. You're rude." Then she snipes into the phone to her mother, (who I'm sure I'll be hearing from soon because heaven forbid I don't pander to her snippy little girl) "Yeah she's got a serious attitude problem, "(hand ove phone and talking to me) "What is your name?"

I tell her my name and then she starts bitching to her mother and at that point I ask her to please hang up the phone and leave the store.

Yeah..people like that annoy me. I can't wait to get the phone call, or even better, the visit, from the mother. Joy abounds!

Never again will I complain about the discomfort of giving birth!

I read an article today about a woman in Florida who was in labor and driving herself to the hospital. She had an accident and ended up giving birth while trapped in a partially submerged car.....WITH A BROKEN LEG!!!!

This woman has my undying respect. It's hard enough to have a baby in a hospital, with family support, doctor's and nurses standing by and medication to help control the pain. But to do it after having sustained injuries in a car crash? Alone? Come on people, that deserves a standing ovation.

Just my thoughts on the whole thing. I'm done now.

*fanfare* I have a new reader....

Okay, so I don't know if she's a "reader", but someone that doesn't know me visited my blog today and, wait for it......LEFT A COMMENT!!!! In honor of this momentous occasion I am recommending that everyone go and check out eyeAmelia

This is the first time I have left a random comment and received one back. I know that many of you are saying to yourselves," This is the dumbest thing I've ever heard someone get excited about."

It's obvious to me that you have never met Vernon.

"4 penguins perish in truck accident; octopus uninjured"

There was a news article on MSNBC about a freak truck accident involving a zoo transport which killed several exotic fish and a few penguins. This is sad. Death is sad. That being said....

The headline makes me want to giggle everytime I read it! I'm sorry, but it does. How can you read that and not think things like: "Was the octopus wearing his seatbelt?" "Which penguin was driving?" I would like to find out who wrote this headline and ask them if they read it first. Another fine example of why I believe that all headlines, signs, advertising etc. should be read by a panel of thirteen year old boys first, if any of them laugh, re-write it.

This was obviously a serious accident and involved human drivers and the loss of life, even though it was animal life....perhaps a better headline would have been, "Freak accident kills exotic wildlife." or "Zoo Transport Suffers Freak Accident"

It makes you wonder if the journalist that wrote this piece took it seriously, or if they sort of blew it off because none of the human occupants died. I believe that if one of the human occupants of the truck had been killed, the headline would have been far less cavalier.

Apparently I'm a Summer, and all these years I thought I was an autumn

I always pop in to Steph's blog and take these quizzes she posts, mostly because it amuses the hell out of me. Every now and then I find one I can't resist posting. Anyone who knows me well will be able to pick out the right and the wrong here....

The other one I just threw in because, well because it made me laugh until I almost peed myself.

Your True Birth Month Is July

Tactful Honest Friendly Secretive Homebody Sentimental Hardworking Approachable Fun to be with Has reputation Not revengeful Easily consoled Very emotional Wary and sharp Waits for friends Likes to be quiet Witty and snarky Caring and loving Loves to be alone Overly concerned Loves to be loved Treats others equally Puts in effort in work Takes pride in oneself Moody and easily hurt No difficulties in studying Strong sense of sympathy Forgiving but never forgets Quiet unless excited or tensed Not aggressive unless provoked Concerned about people's feelings Temperamental and unpredictable Judge people through observations Easily hurt but takes long to recover Guides others physically and mentally Dislikes the nonsensical and unnecessary Difficult to fathom and to be understood Sensitive and forms impressions carefully Always broods about the past and the old friends

What's Your True Birth Month?

Your Boobies' Names Are...

Tweedledum and Tweedledee

Boobie Name Generator

The Museum of Bad Art

A few days ago I was browsing around and came across an article about the ten weirdest museums in America. Now, I don't know about you, but I'm into weird. Weird is good. It keeps things from being boring, breaks the day up a bit. I read the list and my favorite turned out to be The Museum of Bad Art.

The Museum of Bad Art is in Dedham, Mass. and was founded in 1993. The collection is made up of things you would find on back shelves of thrift shops and pieces that would clutter up yard sales, desperately trying to find homes.

A couple of my favorite pieces? Peter the Kitty, How pissed off does that cat look? And Mama and Babe, Does that picture remind anyone else of "The Outer Limits"?

Take some time and browse the website. Of particular interest is the admission price and the location description. I plan to take a vacation to the East Coast specifically to take my daughter to this place. Better than the Giant Ball of Twine!

Iraq and its toll

The toll of the Iraq war on our country is going to be a lot higher than many of us ever really considered. Today a report is being cited in the news that states US Marines killed Iraqi civilians in cold blood. Our soldiers, men and women that were sent by our government to a country that didn't ask for our prescence, are now being accused of crimes so atrocious I have a hard time wrapping my mind around them.

What had to happen to these men that would cause them to do something so wicked? In their daily lives, in the normal world I'm sure that the men and/or women being accused of this crime are not sociopathic killers. Yet here they are, standing accused of slaughtering innocent civilians, women and children. Why?

I have to believe it is because they have been kept in a place we had no right to be to begin with for far to long. These brave and valiant soldiers have been sent into a terror zone and subjected to things I can't even begin to imagine. The damage to their minds and their souls must be horrific. I feel sorrow for them and their families and I feel shame for my government for allowing this to continue.

If you are reading this, sit down and write to your Congressman. Write to all of them if you can. Let them know that this has gone on long enough. It's time to bring our soldiers home. It's time to stop this before anymore of OUR people suffer, not to mention the harm we are doing to a country not our own.

The Stepford Wives...living right next door. Hitler would be so proud.

I have just read an article about Home Owners Associations in our country. They are set up under the guise of keeping neighborhoods clean and uniform...providing a positive living experience for everyone that lives there. You know, no rusting cars in the front yard, no rotting piles of garbage, that kind of thing. Sounds nice doesn't it?

But wait....

As I read on it turns out that these "associations" can fine you for things like painting your house an unapproved color, or not cutting your lawn enough. And that if you don't pay the fines you can actually be, get this, FORCLOSED ON. Now how is that even possible? I mean seiously people? What kind of acid are you taking the day you agree to give John Q Dimplehead across the street the power to tell you it's not okay to paint your house THAT color blue? And to risk losing the home YOU are paying for over it? How does that even begin to sound like a good idea?

Ahhh...the American Home Owners Association. Stepford Families of the world now have a place to call there own. Somewhere they can all gather and homogenize and teach their children that diversity is a word somewhere in the "d" section of the dictionary.

Hitler would be so proud.

Apparently Ken Jennings isn't boring...who knew?

Sadly, I have had nothing of interest to say for the last several days. This annoys me. Am I losing my touch? Am I getting old? Have I forgotten how to be a wise ass? No, I just haven't had the time to sit down and write anything.

Let's recount the last several days of my life shall we? On second thought, screw that. I just lived through it, it would bore you to tears, let's talk about something else. Let's talk about...ummm...Ken Jennings. You heard me.

I was reading the news, something I do a lot, and there was an article from the AP that claimed Ken Jennings was hatin' on good ole' Jeopardy. Can you believe it? I mean how dare he? After all Jeopardy did for him? How could he hate on them and an American icon like Alex Trebek. I have to admit, I was curious. So I went to my trusty search engine and typed in "Ken Jennings". The first link that came up was the link to his blog.

I was intrigued, what could a man who had so much useless trivia rattling around in his brain that he won 2.5 million dollars on Jeopardy have to say that would be interesting to me, the general public? I clicked on, eager to see.

I started reading the first post, which by this time had nothing to do with Jeopardy, and found myself giggling and smiling and nodding in appreciation of things that Ken had typed. "Why," I thought incredulously, " Ken Jennings isn't stodgy or boring. Ken Jennings is amusing and intelligent and darn it, I kind of like him." Who knew?

I am proud to say that I know read Ken Jennings blog on a daily basis. I am also proud to report that anyone with a brain will be able to go there, look up the blog post in question and know in about three sentences that he wasn't diggin' on an American Icon. Go on, read it, I dare you!

Lady in the Water

We went and saw "Lady in the Water" last night. I enjoy M. Night Shyamalan's movies. I was a little disappointed by "The Village", but still enjoyed it. After reading some of the reviews, I was curious. Would this movie disappoint me as well?

I can say with total confidence that it didn't. Shyamalan delivers a wonderful tale of good and evil without having to be grotesque or overlly political. It's a movie that you can take your children to see. Something that is a rare find these days. Shyamalan didn't feel the need to add the witty adult humor to the movie to try and make it more appealing. There are no sly inneuendos, no catty remarks, just a good story. Something you might read to your older children at bedtime.

A lot of the reviews I read said that there was no "twist", something Shyamalan has become known for. I have to disagree. If you take the time to see the film, you'll find the twist.

I recommend everyone go and see this movie, take tissue if you cry, but go see it.

Whoever made this quiz is LAME!

I answered all these questions correctly, I know I answered them correctly because when I got my score I was confused, went back and for the hell of it, changed things to answeres I knew weren't right....it won't score you above 90%....unless I'm blind and missed a question...which has been known to happen.

I'm still pissed.

You Scored 90% Correct

You are an 80s expert You never confuse New Order with the Pet Shop Boys You know which classical musician Falco rocked When it comes to 80s music, you Just Can't Get Enough!

How Much Do You Know About 80s Music?

Okay, so now I'm just bored....

Pulled this off of Stephanie's blog. I'm bored and I can't sleep, figured I'd answer pointless questions, then maybe make some phone calls....

A - Available: For Birthday Parties, Weddings and the ocassional Bar Mitzvah.
A - Age: older than some, not as old as others
A - Annoyance: Stupidity...of all kinds.


B - Bestest Friend: Stephanie
B - Bad Habit: Which one?
B - Birthday: December 23

C - Crush: Orange, Grape or Strawberry????
C - Car: none
C - Cats: no thanks

D - Dead Pets: five dogs, two cats, three goldfish, two rabbits and one poor poor hamster
D - Desk Top Picture: A Scanner Darkly still of Keanu
D - Dogs: One...and he's really cute


E - Easiest person to talk to: Stephanie, Dollie or Russ
E - Eggs: Only scrambled
E - Email: As a casual form of correspondance only


F - Favorite color: Purple
F - Food: I'm partial to it.
F - Favorite number: People have those? Isn't that kind of obsessive?


G - Gummy Bears or Worms: Worms...more fun to play with. But then...bears are easier to hide in your pockets
G - God: Has a serious sense of humour
G - Good Times: A great show from the 70's


H - Hair Color: Dark brown...or black, depending
H - Height: 5'5"
H - Happy: Today? Yes


I - Ice Cream: Vanilla, ocassionally something more adventerous.
I - In school?: Soon
I - Idiots?:You're kidding right? Have you been outside?


J - Jewelry: No thanks
J - Jobs: At last count, well over 100
J - Jokes: Most of the ones I know are to long to put in this little space.

K - Kids: Four...two living with me, two adopted
K - Karate: That and about five other Chinese words..yeah, I've seen the T-Shirt too.
K - Know a Katie: Not personally....


L - Longest Car Ride: From Williston, North Dakota to Lake Powell, Utah...When I was nine...in the summer...with no air conditioner...and two toddlers....and an angry mother.
L - Last phone call: From Stephanie
L - Love: Can be a serious pain in the ass.

M - Milk Flavor: Plain
M - Movie Last Watched: NightWatch
M - Moms name: Jorjan

N - Number of Siblings: 5
N - Northern or Southern?: Is this a hemisphere choice, a cultural choice, what?
N - Name: Serena


O - One Phobia: Driving
O - Open About yourself?: Yes
O - Occupation: Manager...Cricket Wireless

P - Parents, are they married or divorced: Biological parents:Divorced Mother and Stepfather: Married
P - Party: Not any more
P - Police: Once or twice...you figure it out


Q - Quote: "Life is a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death." Roslind Russell, Auntie Mame
Q - Quick or Slow: All I can hear now is that song from "Girls Just Want to Have Fun"
Q - Que pasa: Cheddar, oh wait, that's QUESO....


R - Reality TV Shows: Funny as hell, if you watch the right ones
R - Right or Left: Depends on the issue.
R - Right now: Answering these silly questions that no one will ever read.


S - Song Last Heard: Night on Bald Mountain
S - Season: Late Spring or Early Fall
s - Sex: Because of the boobs, I'm going to go with Female.


T - Time to get up: Ask my son, it's usually his call.
T - Time Now: 11:58 PM
T - Time for bed: When I can't keep my eyes open

U - Unicorns: Make for good fiction and great art
U - Unicycle: not my cup of tea
U - Unibrow: Oh, that's just nasty

V - Vending Machine: Home of the hip widner and the gut bomb
V - Visual basic: Never learned it
V - Victory: Q'Pla (only a real geek will be able to read that and tell me what's wrong with it)


W - Water: I need more of it
W - Women: usually dislike me
W - Work: Only because I have to, anyone who says anything else is a LIAR...


X - X-Rays: Will turn you into a raging green monster..oh wait, that was GAMMA RAYS
X - X Files: YUMMY, David Duchovney
X - X Men: Until the last one, pretty damn good...


Y - Year it is now: 2006
Y - Yellow: Wallpaper (obscure literary reference)
Y - Yikes: I'm really really bored


Z - Zoo Animal: I detest zoos
Z - Zerox: streching for it now aren't you..I would have gone with zipper
Z - Zanzibar: Would be nice to visit

I HAVE to stop doing those stupid quizzes!!!!

Okay, this is kind of funny....mostly because the last few names I used I just threw in there.....although the soulmate thing is kind of scary!

What You Really Think Of Your Friends

Stephanie is your soulmate.

You truly love Russell.

You consider Alexandria your true friend.

You know that Judy is always thinking of you.

You'll remember James for the rest of your life.

You secretly think Dollie is creative, charming, and a bit too dramatic at times.

You secretly think that Tiffany is colorful, impulsive, and a total risk taker.

You secretly think that Toney is loyal and trustworthy to you. And that Toney changes lovers faster than underwear.

You secretly think Debby is shy and nonconfrontational. And that Debby has a hidden internet romance.

What Do You Think of Your Friends?

Is anyone that knows me REALLY surprised by this?

You are 70% geek

You are a geek. Good for you! Considering the endless complexity of the universe, as well as whatever discipline you happen to be most interested in, you'll never be bored as long as you have a good book store, a net connection, and thousands of dollars worth of expensive equipment. Assuming you're a technical geek, you'll be able to afford it, too. If you're not a technical geek, you're geek enough to mate with a technical geek and thereby get the needed dough. Dating tip: Don't date a geek of the same persuasion as you. You'll constantly try to out-geek the other.

Take the Polygeek Quiz at Thudfactor.com

Read this....

So I'm at work today and Debby sends me the link to this aritcle by Gloria Steinem. It's called "If Men Could Menstruate" and it's hilarious and true...soooo true.

Stephanie, you will appreciate this, I promise!!!!

Here We Go Again!

Be prepared, I've got the soap box out and primed. This post is going to piss people off and before you even bother to say it: Yes, I'm aware of the fact that immigrants helped build this country, most of my family came here from somewhere else, so let's skip that particular dead horse, all right?

I was reading the news this morning on MSNBC, as I usually do and I came across an article about the House and the Senate debating the "English as a National Language" issue again. This is an issue that has been debated repeatedly for years. Easch time it is defeated and dropped.

Now it is being discussed again, due in large part to the recent immigration discussions. Here's the kicker: It's being called racist.

All I have to say to that is WTF??????? How is it racist to want the people that live in THIS country to speak the launguage taught in it's schools and spoken by the people NATIVE to the country.

Again, yes I know that this country was built by people from other countries, but not solely, and not all of them were non-english speaking. In fact, a large majority of the first people to settle here were native english speakers...AND...when those people came here from other countries, it was with the intention of becoming American citizens, they WANTED to learn English, and they wanted their children to learn English. So I say again, let's not beat that particular dead horse.

Fact is if I moved to another country, any other country, I would be expected to learn it's launguage. It's true that a lot of countries teach English in their schools, but not all citizens speak it and so I would not be able to rely on that. I would have to learn to speak French or Chinese, or Spanish, or Italian, or whatever the native language was if I intended to live and be sucessful in my new home. Why should it be any different for people living here?

I do belive that it is a good idea for children in our schools to learn a second launguage, but I DO NOT believe that they should have to learn a second language simply because a portion of the population doesn't speak English.

It boils down to this: Just like anyone else, just like any other situation, if you want to be successful you have to adapt. English IS the language spoken in the United States. Yes, there are bilingual households. Yes, speaking a second language is a good thing. However, we are an ENGLISH speaking nation, just like a lot of other English speaking nations, we shouldn't be ashamed of it, we shouldn't apologize for it. It's not racist to want the people that live here to be able to communicate freely.

It would be racist to say that if someone didn't speak English you weren't going to teach them, and you weren't going to let them work, but no one is saying that. It would be racist if people that spoke other languages were shunned and not given good opportunities, when in fact, at many jobs, people that speak other languages qualify for pay increases.

I'm putting the soapbox away now. Just remember, before you send me angry notes....please don't beat the dead horse, he's suffered enough.

Pictures of my Daughter for Mother's Day

Judy sent me pictures of Genevive for Mother's Day. Wasn't that thoughtful? I went out and bought a frame for one of them right away, it's one of Genevie and I together. She's so beautiful. I've posted a few that Judy emailed to me last week, just wanted to share her beauty with the world...oh and I added a couple of Jareth, because, well...because it's mother's day and I LOVE MY KIDS!!!

Start your week off with a laugh....(warning:adult content)

More fun stuff from Virob.com. Again, I warn you, if your easily offended, or at work, don't watch this. But it's a good way to start the week with a laugh.

Sunday

It's Sunday. Not much else to say. The weather was nice. I took a nap.

Wow...my life is boring.

I seriously need to try something new. Brazilian frog juggling or French Poodle Shaving or something. Any suggestions? Maybe I'll take up Nude Interpretive Jello Wrestling.

I'll be taking suggestions all week.

The Birthday, The Road Trip and the Blow Up Sheep

I love rainy mornings. The sound of rain against the windows has always been one of my favorite things. My son is still asleep, so I thought I would take some time and come in and write for a minute.

I went on a little road trip with a Stephanie on Tuesday, it was her birthday. Her original plan had been to sit at home and do nothing by herself all day...BORING!!!!! I told her we needed to get her out of the house and do something, anything...she decided we should take a roadtrip to Evanston, Wyoming. (For those of you NOT from Utah, Evanston is just over the border and it's where all the repressed people go to buy porn and fireworks *LOL*)

So, we get in her car and we head for Wyoming. On the way we listen to 80's music, we sing, we car dance.....you heard me, car dance. This makes everyone else on the road look at us funny and laugh, I'm not sure why. My theory? Life is to short NOT to have fun..so car dance for gosh sake's.

Anyway...

We get to Evanston, grab a quick bite to eat at a local restaurant where we manage to convince the waitress that we are either high or drunk, when we are neither and then we're off to the local porn store. That's right intrepid readers...the porn store.

I have never laughed so hard in my entire life. I have however decided that the job I want is "sex toy namer". You know someone gets paid to just sit around and think up names like, "The Anal Intruder".....I mean come ON, you know whoever thought that up was laughing their butt off , or stoned, or most likely both. Stephanie and I were laughing so hard I thought I would pee my pants. There was this little vibrator shaped like a DOLPHIN....I'm not joking, a damned dolphin...and we were both making jokes about it:

"I wonder if it makes the noise...."insert me making dolphin noise here"

Stephanie: "Even better, I wonder if it makes YOU make the noise..."insert BOTH of us making dolphin noises here."

There was a store employee standing next to us and at this point he started cracking up.

We moved further up the aisle and at this point I spot...wait for it.... the Blow up Dolls. They had one named Two Ton Tammy. So the employee that we made laugh says: "They even make blow up sheep."

I reply, " Oh Lord, you're kidding, Do they come with Blow up velcro cowboy boots?"

He says: " I don't know, let me check."

The laughter is over the top at this point.....and he comes over with....you guessed it, BLOW UP SHEEP.....I thought I would die.

So yeah...it was a good day. I haven't laughed that hard in ages.

Well, not since the last time I hung out with Stephanie.

A little sad....

Having just realized that her best friend is on vacation this week, our intrepid blogger is a little sad. She realizes this means she will have no one to chat with while her son naps.

*moment of silence for the vacationing Stephanie*

Fun Words

This is my list of words in the English Language that are fun to say. I'll probably update it from time to time. You should try saying some of these words outloud for no reason at all, just to see how fun they are. (If you don't know what the word means, you can always look it up)

(1) lollygagger

(2) kumquat

(3) pfeffernusse (it's a cookie pe*fer*noose)

(4) nincompoop (and it's oh so fun derivation: nincompoopery)

(5) tomfoolery (yes, it is an actual word, I looked it up)

(6) bulbous ( even more fun when paired with the word bouffant and shared with a friend)

(7) mukluk

(8) idiosyncrasy ( this one has many fun derivations, play with them, roll them around on your tounge, make people stare at you....just makes the word more fun)

Well there you have the initial fun word list, I'll update it soon. If you have a word you think is fun ( and isn't a swear word, those don't count....) let me know, I'll add it to the list.

House Hunting in a small town

Russ and I have been trying to find a new place to rent for a month or so now and so far no luck. We thought we had found a place, but the owners are dragging their feet. They don't seem to actually want to rent the place. Last time I spoke with her, the owner said it would be at least a month (putting us into June) before the house would be ready, and that there were " a lot of interested applicants", so I'm guessing that's out. That leaves me with the unenviable task of having to find something else. This bums me out.

Everything in town is either to small or to expensive. So I decided to look at houses for sale. Well not actually houses, manufactured homes, but still. The problem: (1) down payment and (2) financing. I'm not working and Russ's credit has been screwed by that whore of an ex wife of his. ORS (I'll get to them in a minute) has his child support on his credit record, that could screw us before we even get out the door. But I have to try. The house payment on the one we're interested in would only be $170 a month, so even with utilities, we would only be paying about $400 a month, which would make it easy to pay the bills, even on one income.


All I know is I have to have someplace else to live before June 1st, when my daughter comes home. This trailer is not big enough and well, you've read the rest before.

And in other news:

Got a notice in the mail that ORS has DOUBLED Russ's child support payment, like we aren't barely making it now....so I called and talked to someone, and for the first time, I actually got some real information and some actual help. We'll see how that goes.

Okay, I'm done bitching now.

It Takes a Special Kind of Idiot.....(Do Not Watch if you are easily offended)

It takes a special kind of idiot to do something like this to himself. I'm betting he rode the short bus to school.

Special Note to any Shrinking Violets in the audience: Don't Watch This!!!!

It's a work of FICTION....

I've read The Da Vinci Code twice now. I still don't see what all the hype and outrage is about. It's a book. More over, it's a FICTIONAL book. I know that there are historians and scholars that claim Christ married and had a child, but this book...THIS particular piece of writing is FICTION. If peopel read it and get all confused then they should seriously think about therepy because if you can't seperate reality from fiction in your own mind, well......

I can understand why some people may not have wanted to read the book. They may have seen it as attacking the foundation of the Christian faith. I may not agree, but I respect their feelings. What I can't get behind is this sudden media driven push to stir up a controversy over a piece of FICTION!!!!

When Dan Brown comes out with a book he presents as fact, and then produces something he claims is hard evidence to back it up, then I will agree with people getting a little harried. Until that time, pull your panties out of your buttcheeks and sit down. It's a BOOK...for ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY!!!!

SHEESH!!!!!!

So yeah......

Well, here it is almost midnight and I'm still awake.....AGAIN. Anyone reading this surprised? No? Didn't think so. Moving on.

The day started out well, got some good news, got excited about that. Then it turns out the good news was falsely delivered....so yeah. I hate when people tell you something before they verify the facts, get your hopes all up and then WHAM!!! All of a sudden you're having a shitty ass day. What's up with that.

Now, as if having the rug YANKED out from under me isn't enough I get told...wait for it....I'm being irrational. So, let's recap shall we? I get told story A then arrive at my destination and am told that no, sorry, Story A was incorrect and you have to wait a week. This throws everything I have just planned for out of whack and puts in serious jeopardy several things. While this may not be said persons fault, it doesn't make the event any less real, or any less traumatic....right?

Then when said person begins to badger me about what's going on and I tell them it's nothing I want to discuss, they tell me I'm being irrational. God love lawyers.

I just want to find a nice quiet place to hunker down with a book and a tall glass of diet pepsi...is that so wrong?

God I need a vacation!!!

Have I ever mentioned?

Have I ever mentioned how much I hate waiting? I'm horrible about it. I want everything to happen right away, and when it doesn't it irritates me. Given that little fact, it's amazing I'm so happy being a mom. LOTS of patience required there.

Have I ever mentioned that I have a secret love of Romance Novels? Not ALL Romance Novels, just certain authors....it's one of my guilty little pleasures. I'm currently indulging that little pleasure, having read six of them in the last three days.

Have I ever mentioned that I hate wearing a bra? I really do, I hate them. If I could get away with it, I would never wear one again. I envy women with small, pert little breasts. They buy bras because they're cute and not because otherwise their boobs hang to their bellybuttons. That's just unfair. *shrug* On the other hand, I look much better in tank top or a strapless dress than they do.

Have I ever mentioned that underneath my ranting, somewhat liberal exterior beats the heart of a conservative? I KNOW. I was shocked too. It seems to only rear its ugly little head when matters involving children pop up. Strange, when I was young I was TOTALLY liberal. This may not bode well for the future.


Have I ever mentioned that sometimes I have a tendency to prattle on about nothing in particular?

Bees Wasps and Hornets .....Oh My!!!!

Yesterday is was BEAUTIFUL outside, I mean REALLY GORGEOUS!!! It was one of those nearly perfect days that you just want to spread a blanket out in the yard and lay in the sun soaking up the rays.

Well, I don't have a yard, and I'm in no shape to be laying out....not to mention I don't own anything to lay out in, so we opted for the take the child to the park option.

We took Jareth and went to the city park to play, it was good fun, we stayed for about two hours. He had a blast. After the park we decided to walk downtown and then out to Walmart to do some shopping.

Stopped and bought some summer clothes for the boy. Picked up a couple of DVD's. Stopped and had some lunch. Nothing extraordinary, right? (Well except for the stunning move I made at Subway where I managed to drop a piece of marinara covered meatball RIGHT onto my right breast. Left a HUGE stain. Yeah, that was fun. )

Anyway, we get all the way out to Walmart and we decide to stop in at Gamestop first, check and see what old Playstation games they have.....hang in there I swear this story is going somewhere.....

So we walk into the store, laughing, talking, blah blah blah...I walk over to where the Playstation games are and all of a sudden my arm hurts. I slap at my arm and kind of rub it and I say, " Shit, what the hell is wrong with my arm." Then it hurts again, sort of a sharp little pain, but nothing serious, just kind of weird, you know? I complain again, but pretty soon it goes away so I think nothing of it.

I'm standing there looking at movies and talking to this girl I know when she says, " You had a bee in your shirt." I look at her and say, "I had a what?"

She turns and points as the bee flys off through the store, " I tried to swat at it. It flew out of your shirt."

At this point my brain clicks on and I say, " Oh crap, I wonder if that's why my arm was hurting. I wonder if I got stung."

I lift up my shirt sleeve and sure enough, there it is, a bee sting. Well, not just A bee sting....FOUR beetings. Yeah, so it wasn't a bee, it was probably a wasp or something and it stung me four times, and apparantly I wasn't there enough to notice. How do you like that?

I haven't been stung by a bee since I was nine. I haven't been stung by anything since I was nine. And then WHAM four in one day. Big kicker here, the stings were gone in under two hours, totally vanished. You can't even tell I was stung at all.

What a thing.

It was still a nearly perfect day though.

This one is good for a laugh on a Friday, too

You have to wonder who has this kind of time on their hands.

This is Just Wrong.....Funny, But Wrong

Just watch the video.....*shakes her head* So funny, and still so wrong.

Genius I tell you, sheer Genius!!!!

The geniuses over at the Harvard Medical School have decided that chronic stress could help cause depression. Gee guys, you think???? I thought Harvard was for smart folk. You know, smarter than most....smarter than say, me....

I could have told you that chronic stress would contribute to and even CAUSE depression. How much grant money from the federal government do you suppose these idiots wasted on this brilliant piece of academic work?

Seriously people, I haven't seen something this stunning since the fabulous ketchup flow rate study of the 1980's.

Read the article. Basically, they made mice stressed out ( how hard do you supppose THAT is to do?) and then measured which ones seemed more depressed.

And I quote:

"Compared to the mice with short-term exposure, the mice with chronic exposure took much longer to emerge from a small dark compartment into a brightly lit open field. This is a common behavioral test of anxiety in animals. The results suggest that the mice with chronic exposure were more fearful and less willing to explore their new environment." (they are reffering to a hormone they gave the mice to simulate chronic stress)


And here's the kicker....they actually got PUBLISHED!!!!!!! And not in like Bob's Big Book of Crap We Already Knew. They got published in Behavioral Neuroscience. Must have been a slow month for the scientific community.

The Plight of the Fat Girl

I hope I lose this baby weight quickly because I seriously don't think I'm going to last long as a fat girl again. I've been browsing the "plus size" clothing that's out this summer and OH MY GOD!!! Can you say Ungodly Ugly Batman? I knew that you could. I want my damned jeans and my funky tshirts back....and I want them back now.

I refuse to walk around dressed like my grandmother!! *insert stomping of the foot here*

I will be back in my oh so cute size 12 jeans and my check out my great breasts tshirts by August if I have to go to the stupid gym every freaking day! *stomps foot once more for good measure and dramatic, childlike effect*

Okay, I feel better now.

Joe Cartoon

So I'm checking out Steph's blog tonight like I always do and she has a link to Joe Cartoons website posted. (click the title...go on, you know you want to) I haven't been there in ages, it was good fun.

You have to check out the new one, 10 Pump BB Gun and don't miss Live and Let Dive 2. You have to hunt for that one, but it's worth it.

If you've never been to this site before, spend some time, surf around, you'll be glad you did. If you've been before, but it's been awhile, reaquaint yourself...good times to be had by all.

UnSexy Men

Apparently two men wrote this list. Hmmmm.....now did they ask women or did they just decide they thought these men weren't sexy? Because I disagree with several of their choices, but then we've already established that I have slightly weird taste in men.

I actually had to look up several of the men on the list, most of them sports related...or politically affiliated. And I have to admit, I agree with the whole Brad Pitt thing. I really don't find him all that attractive. (Please reference weird taste in men comment)

Here's the list, see if you agree with it:(wuth occassional commentary by yours truly)

Complete List

001. Gilbert Gottfried (Come on, I think he's kind of cute...seriously)

002. Randy Johnson

003. Roger Ebert

004. Dr. Phil McGraw (Not what I would call *sexy* but not *unsexy* either)

005. Alan Colmes

006. Chad Kroeger (Sooooo do not agree with this one!!)

007. Mike Mills

008. Osama Bin Laden (Unsexy? How about Fucking EVIL???)

009. Jay Leno ( A sense of humor and great hair....)

010. Don Imus

011. Michael Jackson (Shivers...)

012. Wallace Shawn

013. Mike D. of the Beastie Boys

014. Richard Simmons (One of the gayest gay men ever)

015. Jon Lovitz ( Again, I think he's got something kind of cute goin on)

016. Carrot Top ( Two words Ick Y)

017. Jerry Seinfeld

018. Malcolm Gladwell (WHO?)

019. Chevy Chase (Totally shouldn't be on the list)

020. Raffi

021. Ron Howard (not really unsexy, just hard to get past the whole Richie Cunningham thing)

022. Clint Howard (Horror movie level not sexy)

023. Bill Gates ( There is a difference between seriously nerdy and not sexy...although Bill has BOTH)

024. Paul Shaffer

025. Axl Rose (Drugs will do that to you)

026. Tim Burton (Wierd, but kind of hot)

027. Edward James Olmos

028. Gerard Way

029. Don Zimmer

030. Tony Kornheiser

031. Chris Kattan

032. Otis Nixon

033. Julian Tavarez

034. Christopher Lloyd ( LOVE HIM)

035. Willie McGee

036. Pat Cummings

037. Scottie Pippen

038. Larry David

039. Michael Moore

040. Al Franken

041. Paris Latsis

042. Rush Limbaugh (Any one that finds this man sexy should seek immediate professional help)

043. David Gest

044. Gary Busey

045. Nick Nolte ( Have you seen the mugshot????)

046. Leif Garrett (One of my first loves, but honestly has gotten crusty in the old age)

047. Andy Dick (Just creepy)

048. Scott Stapp

049. Lyle Lovett

050. Ric Ocasek

051. Bill Wyman

052. Danny DeVito

053. Peter Jackson

054. Drew Carey ( Now this man is an example of Nerdy SEXY....)

055. Newt Gingrich

056. Rob Schneider

057. Ed O'Neil

058. Bill O'Reilly

059. Clay Aiken ( Santa's elf unsexy)

060. Joe Lieberman

061. Jim Gaffigan

062. Bill Maher

063. John Popper

064. Dennis Miller

065. John Madden

066. Robert Englund

067. Robert Patrick (Disagree...I'd do him)

068. John Ashcroft

069. Joe Gannascolli

070. Kevin James

071. George Steinbrenner

072. Grady Little

073. Harvey Pekar

074. DJ Qualls

075. Joey Buttafuoco

076. Garry Shandling

077. Meat Loaf Aday

078. Joe Walsh

079. Tom from Myspace

080. Art Garfunkel

081. Brian Posehn

082. Howie Mandel ( Definatly sexy since he went bald)

083. Barry Bonds

084. Dick Vitale

085. Richie "La Bamba" Rosenberg

086. Jeff Van Gundy

087. Jimmy Johnson

088. John Clayton

089. Don Vito

090. Lemmy Kilmister

091. Jose Canseco

092. Bill Parcells

093. Ric Flair

094. Ralph Nader

095. Dennis Kacinich

096. Horatio Sanz

097. Dom DeLuise

098. Emeril Lagasse

099. Kevin Federline (white trash nasty unsexy)

100. Brad Pitt ( had his moments, but not sexy....Fight Club, I could see it...but not on my top ten list)

The Boobie Fairy

The Boobie Fairy arrived sometime last night. I was hoping to avoid that particular side effect of pregnancy this time, I'm not sure why I was deliusional, but there you have it. Now I have boobs twice their normal size and I get to milk myself like a cow every day for the next week or so.

To much information???? *shrug* Ahh well, as uncomfortable as I am right now, I feel the need to spread it around, even if it is only intellectually in the form of unsettling images. HonestlY? If it wouldn't border on pornographic I would probably post before and after images. *laughs* (Those of you who know me know I'm kidding now)

I called the local gym today to find out if they have a trainer on staff who can keep me from killing myself when I start working out to lose the MASSIVE amount of weight I gained....I am going to post before and after shots of that, because it will be worth it. I mean for the love of Bob...I have FAT FEET!!!!!! Do you know how depressing that is? Fat feet, I never even knew my feet could gain weight. I'm a little disgusted and at the same time fascinated.

I have a feeling that a lot of time will be devoted to talking about my body and it's radical and sometimes disgusting shifts over the next months.....look away now if you have a weak stomach.

Fair warning has been given.

New Baby!

I had the baby on Friday, April 14th, at 3:09 p.m. I tried to post pictures to this posting, but for some reason, they wouldn't come up. Sooooo, I have linked this post to the post on Stephanie's Blog that contains pictures of Genevive, James and Judy.

Genevive weighed 7 lbs 10 oz and was 20 inches long. She's got beautiful, alert blue eyes and a full head of soft brown hair. In short, she's perfect. James and Judy are the picture of new parents, always watching her, checking her toes and looking at her fingers, it's very sweet.

Judy is going to be THE mom. You know the one. She was the ultimate...you would go over to that particular friends house for sleepover and there was always something cool to do...a craft project, cookies to bake, a new game they had invented...something GREAT!!! Yeah, that will sooo be Judy!

And James...well, James is going to be that dad we all envied our friends for having. The one they all pretended to be embarrassed about, but you knew they were proud to have them. The dad that chaperones the dances, but manages not to get in the way. The dad that takes time out of his Saturday to drive his preteen daughter and five of her giggly friends to the mall...all by himself. The dad that threatens to break the legs of the first boyfriend that makes her cry...he never really does it, but just knowing he would makes her feel better. Yeah, that's James.

Genevive is one very lucky little girl. Her life will be filled with art and color and love and she will grow up knowing that the world can be a special wonderful place.

Russ and I will miss her each day, but knowing where she is and all that she is blessed with, we will smile everytime we think of her and her family.

My son had a nightmare tonight. He woke up crying and scared and he wanted me to snuggle him. I can't even explain what that feeling is like, to have this tiny, precious little person look at me with such trust and love.

It's humbling.

So I snuggled him. We sat in the Big Comfy Chair and watched a movie until he fell asleep, and then I just watched him sleep for a little while.

When I was young I thought the world was about getting a job that paid a lot, about having tons of people like you....and then I had children. Now I know that life is about making sure the people you love are safe and secure. God entrusted me with these two precious lives, made them mine to care for and I couldn't have asked for a better job.

I'm a mommy. No matter what else I accomplish in my life time, nothing will ever match the importance or the accomplishment of that.

If you have children, and you read this...take time tonight to just watch them sleep, it's a miracle right there in your own home.

This is all Stephanie's fault...I just want everyone to know that.*smile*

All right, I'm posting this here so that maybe, just maybe one or two of you, and I think that's all there are, will answer it....just so I don't feel like more of a geek than I already am.

********************************
Okay, seriously, I'm only doing this because I can't sleep.

Two Names You Go by
1. Serena
2. Mommy

Two Parts of Your Heritage
1. Greek
2. Norwegian (don't even ask)

Two Things That Scare You
1. My children being hurt
2. My house catching on fire.

Two Fears You Overcame
1.Being alone
2. Trusting a person I didn't give birth too.

Two of Your Everyday Essentials
1. Diet Soda
2. BOOKS

Two Things You Are Wearing Right Now
1. Underwear
2. t-shirt

Two Things You Wore Too Much This Year
1. track pants ( give me a break, I'm pregnant)
2. white tshirts (see above)

This Year's Favorite Bands or Musical Artists
1. Beth Hart
2. Sarah McLachlan

Two of Your Favorite Bands or Musical Artists
1. DURAN DURAN
2. Counting Crows

Two Things You Want in a Relationship
1. Honesty
2. Communication

Two Physical Things That Appeal To You
1. strong hands
2. Smile

Two of Your Favorite Movies of the Year
1.A History of Violence
2. Walk the Line

Best Movies of All Time
1. The Road Home ( Chinese)
2. Star Wars

Two Things You Hate
1. Lying
2.fake concern

Two of Your Favorite Hobbies
1. writing
2. reading

Two Things You Learned Last Year
1. I can let go of the past
2. Money really isn't that important

Two Accomplishments You Are Proud Of
1. My children
2. Not hiding my mental illness

Two Things You Want Really Badly
1. To take my daughter on vacation
2. To finish my college degree

Two Places You Went Last Year
1. Wendover ( with Steph)
2. North Dakota

Two Places You Want to Go on Vacation
1. China
2. New York

Two Things You Want to Do Before You Die
1. Sky Dive
2. visit the Smitsonian

Two Ways That You Are a Stereotypical Example of Your Gender
1. I get angry at stupid crap
2. I think men are pigs

Two Things That Make You Stand Out
1. My breasts
2. My laugh

Two Things You Normally Wouldn't Admit
1. I actually like one Brittany Spears song
2. I have worn pink in public before.

Two Things You Are Thinking About Now
1. Finishing the paper work for the adoption
2. How to finish the poem I started last night

Two Favorite Web Sites
1.jorgelives.blogspot.com (nepotism lives!!! I have to admit, I'm biased)
2. Barnes and Noble.com

Two Favorite Sports (to watch and/or play)
1. Sports??? What?? Ughhh
2.

Two People Who Will Fill This Out
1. If I post it? Russ and ummm...maybe Matt
2.

Two Things You Did Last Night
1.Worked on homework
2. stayed up to damn late

Two Shows You Like To Watch
1. Numbers
2. House.

Two Places You Like To Go To
1.The Bookstore
2. Amywhere with Steph

Two Favorite Subjects In School
1. English
2. History

Two Favorite Places To Eat
1. Truckstops
2. anywhere else I can get good fries ( I'm easy to please)

Two Things You Like About Yourself (physically)
1. lips
2. skin

Two Things You Ate Today
1. Stouffer's French Bread Pizza
2. Shredded Wheat

Two People You Last Talked To
1. My attorney
2. Russ

Two Things You're Doing Tomorrow
1. Getting Jareth's Picture taken
2. Maling paperwork

Two Goals for the New Year
1. lose the baby weight
2. Start school again

Work in Progress

i am the silence in the hallway
that thing you whisper to yourself
promises you never kept

i know you

i am your guilty secret
slick like rain water on a greasy drive
dirty and polluted


i am every angry moment
all the shivers in your spine

i am the judgement that waits for you
every blow you landed
every ugly word you threw

i caught them
tight inside my skin


Started working on this the other night....inside my head....wanted to get it written out and see how it felt. Comments appreciated.

Let's Not Forget

While we in this country sit and scream at each other about whether people who enter our borders illegally should be given special treatment, let's not forget that the world continues to go on.

Let's remember a few things that might put what we are squabbling over in perspective:

People are dying of starvation in all parts of the world, including the United States. Statistics from a recent article:

"Food has never before existed in such abundance. The U.S. alone produces enough to feed half the world—even though one in eight Americans suffers from hunger. In Brazil, one in five people in cities is overweight, while 40 percent can’t afford to buy quality food. India, nearly self-sufficient in food production, has twice the number of underweight children as sub-Saharan Africa. If there’s plenty to eat, why are 852 million people around the world—mainly women and children—on the verge of starvation?"


"Why?" is a good question, don't you think?

Wars in the third world and the middle east continue to tear families apart and kill innocent men, women and children. Imagine having to worry about sending your child to school in the morning because you are afraid they might not make it home alive, or worse still, having no school to send your child to. Imagine living somewhere like Afghanistan where when winter comes you have no means to build adequate shelter or provide adequate food and you know that by the end, you will have seen one or more of your children die of cold or starvation.

The next time you prepare to open your mouth to begina diatribe about how horrible things are here, about how the government isn't doing what it needs to do, look around. Do you have a roof over your head? Did your children go to bed with full stomaches last night? If the answer is yes, I would suggest you take ten seconds and think about what it would be like to have to answer no.....kind of places things in a different light, doesn't it?

Where there's smoke, there's fire.....somewhere

Getting ready for bed last night and all of a sudden the entire back half of my house smells like something is burning.

Okay...breathe deep, don't panic. RIGHT!

I promptly begin to freak out, because dear reader, I am scared to damn death of having my house catch on fire.

It's midnight, it's cold outside, the wind is blowing and we have no flashlight...but I make Russ go outside and check under the trailer (yes, I live in a little redneck box)I want to know if there is a reason for me to continue to panic or not.

Russ, being a man, doesn't think before he answers the following question, " Do you see anything under there?"

He answers, " Yeah, I see something." He doesn't bother to eleaborate.

This answer sends me scurrying into the house to grab the phone and begin the frantic dialing of 911. Luckily he catches me in time and adds this, " I don't think it's fire though." My heart rate goes down a bit.

After about ten minutes, we locate the source of the smell. Our neighbors are burning some particuallarly nasty smelling wood and because of the wind and lack of proper insulation at my home, the smoke is getting blown inside.

I don't sleep well all night....and I've had enough excitement to last me all weekend, thank you very much.

I'd like to kill Murphey, whoever he was....

You know that whole Murphy's law thing? Well I would love to go back in time and kill whoever "Murphey" was.

We just get caught up enough to have some room and Russ loses his job due to a "slow down"....I have three weeks left until the baby is born, so no one is going to hire me right now....Murphey's law, you see?

"If anything can go wrong it will, and at the worst possible moment."

*dramatic sigh* Seriously, just felt the need to bitch for a brief moment. I'm seriously thinking about building a time machine and returning to the glory of being twelve....school, sleepovers and the occasionall babysitting job. Anyone want to join me?

Yikes!!

If you can look at this and not laugh, I don't know what's wrong with you.

Got a new computer!!

My new computer arrived this evening, all bright and shiny and full of promise.

And then....

There was so much CRAP already installed!!! It took me the better part of an hour to clean it up. I'm still rearranging the settings so IE isn't screwing with me everytime I turn around.

Tomorrow I get to network my two hard drives together...that should be fun!

Still...I got a new computer!!!

WARNING: This post will probably offend most everyone that reads it!!!!!!!

I have had enough !! Have you been reading or watching the news lately? This whole thing about immigration laws? Are they serious? I mean the people standing out in the street yelling that their rights are being infringed upon, screaming, " I'm an American, too!"

No, you are not an American. Unless you have entered this country legally, pay taxes and have begun the naturalization process, you are NOT an American. You are an illegal immigrant.

Scream all you want to about how this country was founded by immigrants. The fact is that that was over 100 years ago and the immigration laws, if there were any were different. We are talking about NOW...Today....not "was" or "back then". If you come into this country illegally, I don't care what you're intentions were, I don't care why...you are here against the law and it should be treated as such. I don't even care what country you come from, Mexico, Canada, Cuba, Finland....makes no difference. Here illegally is here illegally.

If I were to slip unnoticed into another country and try to set up residence and I got caught, I would be treated as a criminal, deported...etc...why should it be any different here.

I'm all for people having the ability to make their lives and the lives of their families better, but come ON....it should be done properly. I'm sorry if people feel that this is the place to come to fix everything, but if we, as a nation, don't start fixing the things that are wrong with US we're doomed to continue to decline.

What about the welfare system? Overburdened and severly outdated? What about the lack of support medically and mentally for the poor and the needy that were BORN in this country?

When somone that was born here...no matter what their ethnic background gets turned away when they need assistance, but someone that is here illegally can get assistance, doesn't that sound wrong?

Don't get in my face and scream at me that they have rights, too. I know that, but it should have to be done according to the LAW. I have to live by them, I have to follow them...if people want to live here and be "Americans" then they should have to do the same?

Why is it that in this country we either swing all the way to the left, or allll the way to the right?

Where in the BLUE HELL did all of the common sense in the world go? If anyone has seen it, please pack it up and ship it back, because I'm about to scream.

A Moment of Silence

The man responsible for inventing the chicken nugget has died.

I was browsing through the news on MSNBC and came across an article talking about Robert Baker, who, at the age of 84, passed away this month. Apparently Mr. Baker was the man responible for the invention of the chicken nugget.

Anyone reading this not remember the first time they had chicken nuggets? It's practically a staple of most American toddlers diets between the ages of 2 and 4. They serve them in all varities in all kinds of restaurants.


I used to have Chicken Nugget toys from McDonald's, back when Happy Meals came in little boxes you could never close and the nuggets were packaged in a styrofoam container.

Let's face it folks.....even if we would like to think that we are of higher sensabilities and like to hear only "important" news, doesn't it make you a little sad to know that the man who invented such a great comfort food has left us?

Makes me a little sad.

Sick Baby

My son has been sick all weekend. I feel so bad for him because I can't fix it and he just doesn't understand why. It's the part of being a parent that I hate the most. The part where your child looks at you and is hurt and crying and all you can do is pick them up and snuggle them.

He had a fever most of the weekend and didn't want to eat. We spent most of our time sitting on the couch with me rubbing his little feet and whispering to him to get him to try and sleep.

When the fever finally broke, he sat up and smiled a tired smile and blew me a little kiss.....and I swear to God, it made my eyes tear up. He is the sweetest little thing.

This is the first time he's actually been sick..you know, something more than the sniffles, so it was hard on me....even harder on his daddy.

Russ had to work on Friday and so he wasn't able to stay home and do the snuggle kiss thing. Poor man looked like he was going to the gallows when he walked out of this house on Friday morning, his son laying in my arms behind him crying for daddy.

He made it home in record time that night, and spent the rest of the weekend fetching juice, playing cars and rubbing Jareth's back. It was cute and sweet and warmed my heart.

We may not have money, we may live in a ratty ass little trailer, we may not even always like each other...but there is a lot of love in this house. It just takes something like a sweet, exhausted, sick little boy to bring it to the front of our minds. Thank god for children....God couldn't have given me a better gift.

Goodbye Bink

Today my son lost his last "bink" ( his pacifier) and instead of tearing the house apart looking for it, I have decided to let it stay lost.

Now comes a week to ten days of constant crying at naptime and bedtime and at other various times during the day.....I am SOOOO looking forward to this. He's laying in bed right now, exhausted and fussy, but refusing to go to sleep. He knows it's gone and he wants me to find it and I feel like a giant heel because I haven't done it yet.

Parental guilt, you know I love it.

Why is it that this tiny little child can look at me with tears in his eyes and I want to move the earth to make it better? Where does that come from? I have never understood how some people can just watch their children cry in pain, or fear, or uncertainty. I just have to pick mine up, snuggle them and try to reassure them that life will continue and that they will be okay. And when I can't..it kills me inside.

Well, wish me luck with the removal of the final bink.....hopefully he'll get used to it before I cave and go buy him a new one.

Any bets???

Disgusted.....

So I'm reading the news online today and I come across an article on MSNBC about a teacher in Florida accused of having sex with a fourteen year old boy. The DA decided to drop the charges so the victim wouldn't have to testify. So the woman gets off pretty much unpunished.

Here's the part that disgusted me, as I'm reading I come across this quote fromt eh woman:

At a news conference in Tampa, Lafave said she has bipolar disorder, and her attorney said she is getting treatment.

“I want the world to see that bipolar is real,” Lafave said. “Not one time has the media brought up the subject of my bipolar. I challenge you to read a book or an article on bipolar illness.”

I thought I was going to puke. I happen to be bipolar, and there has not been one time in my life, not medicated or otherwise...not in the middle of my WORST manic episode, that I have EVER felt the urge to have sex with a child.

The fact that this is even being presented as a plausible excuse, " Oh, did I have sex with a child, I'm sorry, I was having an episode, it really wasn't my fault." makes me want to call the State Attorney's office in Florida and yell at someone. This woman is, in my opinion, a glaring example of why mental illness has such a stigma still attached to it.

When we allow people to say, "Yes, I did it, but it really wasn't my fault, I'm sick" we degrade the people who have struggled against their illnesses, fought long and hard to overcome them and learned to take responsibility for their own actions.

It's past time that we stand up and say, "There are reasons and there are excuses, we're tired of excuses."

There may be an undrelying cause to a problem, but that doesn't necessarily excuse the person who did wrong from accepting responsibility and punishment for what they did.

Grocery Lists

Do you write a list before you go to the grocery store? What do you do with it when your done? Apparently there is a home for all those abandoned grocery lists.

No, Seriously.....check it out. Click on the title of the post and you'll see what I mean. I could hardly believe my eyes....the internet does have a site for everything.

Just for the Hell of It

Come on, admit it, this is funny!

I was just reading an article about a proposed solution to fears of heightened crime in the disater zone in Louisiana, specifically St. Charles Parish.

They are proposal is this: Hire a private security company and deputize them, give them guns and some "supervision" and places like temporary camps and constuction sites.

Now, I think this sounds like a decent plan, on the surface. It would provide much needed relief to a law enforcement agency being spread to thin by lack of trained personell and lack of money to pay them.

However:

Has anyone considered the following?

(1) it will cost the taxpayers of this country nearly $700 dollars a day, totalling billions, over the next three years. Why not recruit actual officers from other areas of the country, and provide the parish with the funds to pay them what they would normally earn?

(2) What happens the first time one of these "deputies" screws up what would be a legitimate arrest because they get hot headed and do not follow proper procedure? Violation of a suspects civil rights would cause the case to be tossed, and let a criminal go free. And if you think that won't happen...wait, it will.

I think that the government has spent to much time putting people up in hotel rooms and talking about how they are going to fix things. They need to just DO IT!!! Give the people who are homeless and out of work, work rebuilding the city. Give them a place to live...but not cruise ships and hotels.

We need to face the facts, Katrina did serious damage, but sitting around and talking about it isn't fixing anything.

I Love Toys!!!

They have a new show on VH1 called I Love Toys. They are counting down the top 100 toys and I have been surprised how many of them I actually had as a kid.

1. The Big Wheel: Anyone else have one of these? You'd see all the kids in the commercial zipping down the sidewalk, when in reality, you could barely get it moving without someone shoving you down the sidewalk first.

2. Spirograph: I used to run the pen over and over the pattern until the paper cut, yeah I was a twisted child.

3. Baby Alive: I actually had one of these. It was a baby doll that you fed "real" food to and then she peed or pooped her diaper. Charming, huh?

4. Tinkertoys: Oh yeah....sticks and wheels with holes....I used to make Magic Wands and pretend I was a princess.

5. Tonka Trucks: Back when I was a kid, they were made out of metal, and if you got pissed off at one of your friends it could become a deadly weapon. Now they are made of mostly plastic. That's sad.

6. Fisher Price Little People: Little People were made of wood or plastic and were actually little when I was playing with them. Now they have these cherubic little faces and cute little outfits molded onto them.

Toys are so much fun. I love going into the second hand store and finding old toys from when I was little. I actually found an old He-Man action figure the other day....Wow...talk about a gay icon, huh? He-Man was something else.

Ahhh...nostalgia!!!

This one is for Stephanie!!!

You are

What Rejected Crayon Are You?

Midweek laugh......

Just because!

Orwell was right......

Okay, here's a reallly bad idea. Store ALL of your personal and private information on a coporate server.

There's an article on MSN this morning talking about how Google is trying to develope some sort "GDrive". This would take all of the information on your personal computer's hard drive.....cookies, bookmarks, emails....everything....and store it to Google servers.

Anyone besides me see the danger in this little scenario? Are we really so complacent as a society, so lax in protecting our own freedoms that anyone would really take advantage of this? Especially with the Patriot Act in place. What's to stop the federal government from subpeoning Google and making them give full access to all data stored to the FBI or some such nonsense....for the good of National Security, of course. ( Kind of like them looking at peoples library records....for National Security *wink wink*)

Wow....do I sound like a conspiracy theorist or what? Somebody better get me some aluminum foil......

They Got me....

As much as I hate to admit it, I watched the last hour of the Oscars tonight. I didn't mean to watch, but as I was flipping past I got sucked in. I haven't watched an awards show in YEARS and here I end up watchin the Oscars..sheesh.

Have you noticed that there is an awards show for everything under the sun now? It used to be the Grammys, the Golden Globe, the Academy Awards, The Emmys and the Tony Awards. Now they have Billboard, People's Choice, Image, American Music, blah, blah blah...it goes on and on. It's sort of like saying, "Well if you don't win one here, just wait, another award show will be along in a moment."

Do any of these awards even mean anything anymore? I don't watch the Grammy Awards anymore because all of the music coming out today pretty much sounds the same, or is hyped up drivel. They don't give awards for ACTUAL music. The Oscars...well let's just say until they actually gave one to Peter Jackson for LOTR I hadn't agreed with most of the selections in a LONG time...right about the time Whoppie Goldberg didn't win for The Color Purple.

We are becoming a society of people who seem desperate for acknowledgement and pats on the back. It seems to me that very few people do what they do for the sheer love of it, and the ones that do don't seem to get awards.

Am I ranting? I'm ranting....I'll come back when I have something of intellectual value to impart.

Or as soon as the urge to rant overtakes me again....

Whichever comes first.

What I learned today

I learned :

When you let your two year old have red jello, he should be on the tile in the kitchen.

The dog doesn't like red jello, or mini carrots, but he will eat tiny pieces of cheese and broken pringles.

Nair and pregnancy, while sounding harmless enough, is simply not a good idea. ( And that's ALL I'm saying)

Staying up until six am is only fun when you're a teenager and there are cute guys involved, not when your two year old decides that sleeping is something he really doesn't need to do.

Dishes will most certainly NOT wash themselves.

Neither will clothes.

It is possible to get an entire aisle in Walmart to stare at you if you make the same funny noises, out loud, that your toddler makes.

What did you learn today?

My son....the gerbil

Apparently my son is part gerbil. We put him to bed last night, expecting the normal amount of playing around before he went to bed....you know fussing, getting up, pulling toys out....just general" I don't want to go to bed yet" stuff.

About twenty minutes after we laid him down, I sent Russ in to check on him and I hear, " Would you like to come and look at what your son has done?" ( He's always MY son when he gets into something...)

I stepped around the corner and looked into my son's room, and what do I see? A small Nerf footbal we had bought him laying on his bed, torn to shreds....not by little fingers, but by little teeth. It looked like the dog had gotten a hold of it. I laughed so hard I thought I would pee.

At least he didn't shove Cheerio's up his nose though, right?

Apparently there is a new case being heard in England regarding the Da Vinci Code. It seems that the authors of a book, "Holy Blood, Holy Grail" think that author Dan Brown stole his idea from them.

Their attorney claims that they aren't suing based on theft of specific parts of the text, but on the "appropriation of themes and ideas".

Okay....here's my problem with that. Do they honestly believe that they are the only ones to have had that particular idea? I mean really. If you're going to start suing for "appropriation of themes and ideas" every romance novelist in the WORLD is guilty. Those themes and ideas get recycled so often it's not funny, and yet you don't see Nora Roberts and Jayne Anne Krantz fist fighting ont he steps of the courthouse.

I think, personally, that these two men had an idea and the book just didn't take off....and now they want a slice of a more successful pie. Plain and simple.

My son, whom I love dearly, refuses to sleep. It is after two in the morning and he is STILL awake. And not the quiet, snuggled up with mommy awake either. It's the screaming, hollering, crying whenever you put him to bed awake. The one that you just can't ignore.

I have a feeling that the next year of my son's life is going to be very interesting. I'm about to catch all of the "terrible two" stuff my daughter never did.

Stay Tuned.

*insert evil laugh here*

I usually don't post the results of these silly little quizzes, but this one was funny.

You Are 68% Evil

You are very evil. And you're too evil to care. Those who love you probably also fear you. A lot.

How Evil Are You?

I love it!!!

So I have to go out to the hospital lab tomorrow and have that stupid three hour blood test. I've been reading and reasearching about the gestational diabetes tests and it seems that there are a lot of false positives recorded....this does not make me smile.

I will be asking the technician , and my doctor what the difference is between the tests they are having me take and the daily blood testing Russ has to do. I've been checking my blood sugar at random and if I check it in the morning it's around 90 or 95, if I check it after I eat, it's never higher than 115, which, although it's at the higher end, is still well within normal for my age and body weight....at least according to the American Diabetes Association.

It's frustrating not to know what to trust. I'm gonna be so frustrated if I have to spend the last two months of this pregnancy on a special diet...I really am. I'll do it though, because any chance is to much of a chance, you know? *sighs* I hate being a responsible adult, I really do.

Why do we give these things titles?

I was just thinking about that....I hate having to come up with clever or interesting titles for every new post I make. So why do I do it? Am I giving in to peer pressure? No. Am I looking for some sort of recognition of my ability to aptly title every little thing I write? No.

I think I may just stop titling the damn things unless I start the post with a specific theme in mind. Maybe I'll just start posting with no clue as to what you are about to read.

Maybe I shouldn't try to write after midnight anymore.

My son and the snow boots

My son, who is almost two, has been wearing his snow boots everywhere since I bought them for him a month ago. Last night, he was running around the house in a diaper and his snow boots. Needless to say they are his favorite thing.

Here's the problem, they stink. He wears them all the time, usually without socks, so his little feet sweat. And now the boots ( and my sons feet, by the end of the day_ smell awful.

I just don't have the heart to take them away from him, and the lining isn't removable, so washing is out. I think this is one of those things I'm going to chalk up to the " Do you have any idea what I put up with when you were little" column and save it so I can embarrass him in front of his first real girlfriend.

Requiem

It was spring when she met him. He smiled at her when she made a joke. They shared a few conversations in the weeks that followed and she began to look forward to seeing him.

When he asked her out, she said yes, reluctantly. Dating had never been her thing. He laughed and told her it was only drinks, not a marriage proposal.

Summer was touching the earth when he proposed. The sweat of sex still clinging to him. He swore he loved her like he had loved no other. She swallowed her fear and said yes. They held each other like tomorrow could never touch them.

The chill of fall was on the wind when she felt him move away from her. The child inside her moved and she cried for what might not be. She bled and he promised to be with her forever.

Winter froze the ground when she knew he was gone. No more long nights talking, no more casual caresses or whispered words of love. Lies leaked from his mouth, running like acid into her.

Spring came again when the child arrived. Bright and beautiful, coloring her world with meaning. She held him and promised his life would be good. She looked at the man she had thought was good and felt the sorrow leach her strength.

Summer came again and she knew he did not care. No loving touches, no small remembrances. Only more acrid lies. They carved her apart. He only looked through her, not caring for her pain.

It was fall again when they found her. Body broke, torn apart. All she had left was a simple shred of paper, what remained of his only love letter.

Better to die a broken body, a broken heart takes to long.

for her

i wonder
did you ever see the inside of fear
did you ever see the inside of the night

i wonder
did you ever see the long dark
that came before the moment of glory

i wonder
where it all began for you
and where it all ended for me

i wonder

i want to know
where i left the person i was
the things i was going to do

i want to know
where i became the frightened shell
that huddled in the drunken shadow
of nightmares

i want to know

where i woke up
where did i realize i was not the
person i could be

i look into her eyes and

i know

Just a note

Over the next few days I will be posting poetry and some other writings from my other site to this board. This is all old stuff, but I'm closing the other site down so I'm going to post the writing in here for now. some of you have already read this stuff.....so feel free to skip it, or read it again.

That is all....continue with your day

I forgot why I came in here...

Perhaps two in the morning isn't the best time to have important thoughts and try to put them out for the world to read.

I logged in so I could say something that I thought was of vital importance, and then I got totally sidetracked by something and now I've forgotten what it was that was so earth shatteringly important I had to come online at two a.m.

Somebody get me an Ambien.....

Inadequacy...You Know I love it!

I'm feeling a little inadequate at the moment. Well, maybe inadequate isn't the right word, but it's the best one I can come up with at !:16 in the morning. I've been reading the blogs of some other people, and I've come to the following conclusions:

(1) Some people have serious views on some truly non-serious subjects.

(2) Some people put WAY more effort and time into their blog than I do.

Apparently, people actually do read these things. Who knew? Maybe I should spruce the place up a bit. Add some catchy phrases, a few pictures.......

Meh......

Ten Things that make me happy

(1) My children's laughter
(2) The smell of my dog when he's warm from sleeping in my lap
(3) Dollie's smile
(4) The smell of fresh baked bread
(5) The way trees look after a fresh frost has settled on them
(6) Discovering that I can do something I thought I couldn't
(7) Curling up with a soft blanket and a good book to read for a whole afternoon
(8) Spending time with Stephanine
(9) Shopping for nothing special with my daughter, just so we have an excuse to eat Chinese food
(10) Making someone else smile

Do you think I have weird taste in men?

Throughout my life, I have never really gravitated toward "pretty boys". I've always thought I should be the pretty one in the relationship....I want my men to look like men. Oh, and they have to be smart, and have a sense of humour. NOw, I won't say that some of the men I find attractive aren't prety, but they aren't "prety boys". Just thought I'd share a couple of pictures of the men on my "Top Ten Celebrity Boyfriend" list, cause yeah, I have one of those. Aren't they yummy?

The State of Utah vs. well.....my family I guess

So as amyone who has read my profile knows, I live in Utah. I don't know how much longer I'm going to live in Utah basically because I don't want to live in a state that punishes people, men expecially, when marriages don't work out.

Now, please keep in mind as you read this that I am a divorced woman who spent almost eleven years as a single parent. This will put everything I say into perspective.

As I mentioned before, Russ is being sued by the State of Utah, on behalf of his ex-wife, for a child support issue. The first problem is an outrageous amount of back child support, almost $3,000, that his ex claims he never paid. Well, he did pay it, but he paid it in cash and when she got pissed off at him for dating a younger woman, she took him to ORS and said he hadn't paid her anything in over a year. This is NOT what she told Russ happened you understand...she told Russ that the state told her that any money he had given her prior to her coming into their office was considered a "gift" and that they HAD to go after him for back child support.....this is a LIE. Now he has to hunt and find documentation of payments that are over three and a half years old. Fun!

The second problem is that the Office of Recovery Services has known for over a year that Russ has been unemployed, or underemployed and have flat out refused to reduce his child support to something manageable so he could actually make the payments, thereby avoiding this whole mess. He has asked FOUR times in the last year for a reveiw and each time has been told he needs an attorney to do so....

Apparently the State of Utah doesn't feel that their own agencies should follow the Utah civil code guidelines for low income parents. What a double standard.

And just in case you think I'm making a mountain out of a molehill.....Russ is not the only man having this problem. I won't name names, but I know of several men being drug through the rack by the state, simply because they chose to end unhappy relationships.

It amounts to indentured servitude.

I think men, and women, should be responsible for the children they create. I also believe that it should be done in such a way that it doesn't cripple one person for the rest of their lives.

Oh....did I mention that the State takes the attitude that the lazy fat cow of an ex is "entitled" (their word, not mine) to stay home with her children? Meaning that she shouldn't have to work if she doesn't want to. How back asswards is that? Again, if you chose to be the custodial parent, don't you think the burden of supporting those kids is YOURS?

GET A JOB!

( Side note: Russ has, after a LONG search , finally found employment....YEAH!!! He's still underemployed, but at least it's a job!)

Now for the disclaimer.....I realize that some people will be pissed off that I feel this way. Too bad! I already know that there are actually men ( and women) that never pay a dime....they should be taken to task for that. Russ is not one of those men....in the last three years he has paid with every paycheck, until he no longer had a paycheck to pay with. Clear???

End of rant.......( I seem to be doing that a lot lately...ranting I mean.....think it's the hormones?)

It's official....I'm a geek

Webster's defines bibliophile as :

": a lover of books especially for qualities of format; also : a book collector"

I believe dear readers that I qualify in spades.

I have just finished unpacking and shelving five large boxes of paperback books. There are still 2 more large and at least five small boxes of trade size and hardcover books in my storage closet. Not only does this place me, in my opinion, firmly in the "bibliophile" category....I would say it solidifies my "geek" status. When you own more books than bookshelves, well.....they should have a group that meets once a week, right after the alcoholics, to address that issue, don't you think?

I find it sad that more people don't read, that they can't pick up a book and appreciate the time and labor it took to produce a work of fiction. Creating whole worlds in vivid imagery, pictures exploding in your brain as you progress further into the novel.

I love a good movie as much as the next person, probably more ( that's a WHOLE other story) but I'm the goofball you all stare at in the used bookstore that's sniffing the pages and smiling....I know where that book is going to take me, and I'm ready for it.

Do yourself a favor, pick up a book.....any book, and read it. Don't wait for Oprah, or the Today Show, or even the New York Times to tell you that you should. Stop into your local library and pick up something new and interesting, something you never would have read before and crack it open........


A world of wonder and amazement is at your fingertips, don't waste it.

I Just Don't Get It

Valentines Day is fast approaching, and MSN has a lovely little link that will allow those of you who have not put any real thought into what you want to get your loved ones a quick and easy solution. However, that is not what this post is about.

Out of curiosity ( I wanted to see what the going rate on "love" is these days) I clicked on the "Are you a procrasanova" article and began perusing the links listed therein. I came across one for Coach. At the top of their home page are all the lovely little nav bars and there's one labled "Baby", so I clicked it because, well just because.

Here's my question: Who in the BLUE HELL is buying $98 cashmere mittens for their babies?

What could possibly posses someone to think, "Cashmere, that's what my six month old needs." Do these people have NOTHING better to do with their money? I mean come ON people. The first thing that child is going to do is either stick the mitten in it's mouth, or rip it off......the baby just doesn't care if the mitten is cashmere or cotton.

This is a prime example of waste and excess in our society. People sit around bemoaning the state of affairs in the world today and at the same time they are paying some bozo $98 for MITTENS....MITTENS people, I mean you can get mittens for your kids at Target for about $7.....get a clue.

With the extra $91 you could get a whole freakin outfit.

AUTHORS NOTE: If you are reading this and are indeed one of the people buying cashmere mittens and $100 tennis shoes for your kids because they're "cute", do not bother with the angry, offended comments. I will still think it's ridiculous and wasteful. Thank You!

The Dumbest Thing I've Ever Heard......

Do we all know who Lewis Black is? If you don't click the link and check him out. I had a recent re-introduction to his comedy...funny funny shit!!!!!

That's all...just wanted to put that out there.....